With the riots in Baltimore one of the issues being discussed is the breakdown of the Black family. Phillip Bump at the Washington Post tackles this very question in Rand Paul cites a ‘lack of fathers’ in Baltimore. Here’s what the data actually show.
In 2013, the Department of Health and Human Services released a study of father-child interactions between 2006 and 2010. It looked at how often black, white and Hispanic fathers lived with and interacted with their children.
The stats he presents are a bit of a let down, and at times don’t make sense. More striking however is how the Health and Human Services report he is getting his data from defines a father. Who’s your daddy? Why any man who is living in the same house while banging your mom!
Not all men are biological fathers and not all fathers have biological children. In addition to fathering a child, men may become fathers through adoption—which confers the same legal status, protections, and responsibilities to the man and the child as fathering a biological child. Men also may become de facto fathers when they marry or cohabit with women who have children from previous relationships, that is, they are raising stepchildren or their cohabiting partner’s children. In this report, men were defined as fathers if they had biological or adopted children or if step- or partner’s children were living in the household.
I understand that the lines can become blurred here with stepfathers, but not only does this government report not distinguish between legal fathers and stepfathers, it expands the definition of stepfather to mean any man currently shacked up with mom.
HHS is not the only US government agency to do this though. As I’ve shared previously, the US Census uses a very similar definition of father:
Children are defined in this report as all individuals under 18 years old. The survey asks respondents to identify the child’s mother and/or father if they are present in the household. A separate question asks respondents to identify the type of relationship between each child and parent, whether biological, step, or adoptive. All living arrangements are as of the time of the interview.
Stepchildren are identified by the survey respondent, and their stepparent may not be currently married to the child’s other coresidential parent.
While HHS says any man currently shacking up with mom counts as the father, the Census says any man currently shacking up with mom counts as the father so long as mom says so. Either way, fathers clearly can’t matter that much to the US government if distinguishing between the actual father and the man currently banging mom isn’t important.
There are other ways we can tell that fathers don’t matter (and therefore Black fathers don’t matter). Under our current family system fathers are a sort of deputy parent. Just like a sheriff’s deputy serves at the pleasure of the sheriff, a father in an intact family serves at the pleasure of the mother. Our entire family court structure is designed to facilitate the removal of the father should the mother decide she no longer wants him to be part of the family unit. How important can fathers really be, when we have a massive and brutal bureaucracy devoted to helping mothers kick them out of the house?
Lastly, a comment on What Do the Ten Most Dangerous Cities in America Have in Common? that I’ve shared previously is highly relevant:
On a side note, this post catalogs the effects of marriage; but not just any kind of marriage. It documents the need for the kind of marriage where parents, especially men, exert a substantial moral influence, and doing so in neighborhoods which maintain that moral influence. It’s not only that we have parents, but that those parents have a job to do, and society depends on them doing it effectively.
As Cane Caldo astutely notes, the Baltimore single mother of 6 being feted by the media as mother of the year for severely disciplining her riotous son would have been seen very differently if she were a father:
…The media and civil authorities would be outraged if there were video of the young man’s father whooping his son’s ass up and down the street; punching him in the face, jerking him around by the hoodie, and pushing him back home. I imagine that cops would take time out fighting for their lives to arrest such a father.
Pingback: Black Fathers [Don’t] Matter. | Neoreactive
Now, what I begin to wonder is whether this whole situation is someone’s (idea of an) end goal (or, on the way to someone’s end goal) or just the confluence of many different, but related things (and directions) by people/groups unaware of the likely (overall) end result. To me it seems like the latter – in particular, a very unfortunate example of the Law of Unintended Consequences.
@MarcusD:
The Progressives are utterly evil, but also mostly incompetent except at maintaining a Power Structure. What we see in the inner city is the result of exerting that control. Destruction of the Black Family was the intent (feel free to research what LBJ was saying during the Great Society push), but the violent outcroppings aren’t necessarily what they intended. Most of the people pushing their foolishness don’t get Cause & Effect when it’s outside of a Power Structure.
It’s what happens when your god is yourself.
“child’s other coresidential parent”
IOW, their ACTUAL, biological parent.
Bureaucrats…
‘Preciate the kind words.
Those bureaucratic definitions for “father” are impossible to accept as earnest. I do not believe even the authors would agree to those definitions if applied to their own lives. It’s just the automation of ideological jargon; never matched up and compared with reality. The computer is spitting out gibberish and the people keep reading it as if the words made sense together.
Hey Dalrock!
Who’s your daddy? lzlozozllzozoozzo
Just kidding–nice article once again. 🙂
Do you think we will ever see a “Red Pill” presidential ticket?
lzozozoozoz
I suspect the rather odd and minimizing definition of father/stepfather is to cook the books and minimize the destruction that progressive policy has wrought
Dalrock, my comments….
http://www.bloombergview.com/articles/2015-04-29/why-baltimore-will-matter-in-2016
Government can NOT make a boy born in a fatherless home to a never-married mom SOCIALLY EQUAL to a boy born in a wedlocked home. There is no amount of money that can adjust for this no matter how much you and I want to think there is. This is doubly true for daughters born under similar circumstances. And you know what….
…that point will NOT be addressed in the 2016 Presidential campaign by either side. So no, Baltimore (a city that IS one of Hillary’s villages with many village leaders) will not matter, not really
Do you think we will ever see a “Red Pill” presidential ticket?
Maybe in Russia.
Government can NOT make a boy born in a fatherless home to a never-married mom SOCIALLY EQUAL to a boy born in a wedlocked home.
Maybe not, but the federal and various state governments seems to be trying awful hard to make all future boys (not born to “burnankified elites” (TM) lozzoz) socially equal (but less than females) by passing laws that do away with wed-locked homes altogether.
Hey Dalrock!!
Good news!
Da GBFM just got an invite to the Iowa Presidential Convention!
Here is my speech!
Firends, Countrymen, Romans, and Boxer!!
Lend me your earss!! DA GBFM has come up wih the solution to the moral morass!!
THE BILL OF MENZ RIGHTS!!!!
lzozllzllzl every man shall have the right to
1) a womenz who hasth been butthexed less than 4 times
2) said 4 times not being done in the same night nor two consecutive nights niether lzozlzl
3) said butthexing events not being secretly taped without her conthent
4) no woman shall have a right to her husbands assetts if he comes home and finds her banging the poolboy ontop of his ps3 controller, thusly damaging said controller lzozl that would suck
5) wehnu ask a women how many poeple she has been with it wil be law that she will have to verbally multiply her anser by 10, and then add at least half the ass cocking sesssions which still count as sexth in certain religions lzozlzlzl
6) no man shall be made to fund a pussy that it out banging biker drummer cock, nor shall any man be made to pay for past use of a pussy lzozlzlzlz
7) every manz shall be given his NATYURAL RIGHT to his chirldenz lzozlozllzoz
i think that if we can pass this men’;s bill of rights into law, 90% of marriages will last lzozl.zlzlzlzlzl lzozllz which is why the butthex congreth and fiat masters will rail against my sublime logic reason phsilophy and religion lzozlzlzzl
@innocentbystanderboston,
Good post. I detest both parties. American Men have nobody but themselves representing their own interests anymore. I found it sickening last week to see many Republicans wiling to drop their pants and bend over for President Obama to grant him Fast-Track for a TPP that will turn the constitution into toilet paper.
What irks me is the faux outrage in the media about the riots. Gasp. Shocking. Their outrage is pathetic. This is the exact society the media has championed for America for several decades.
What happened in Baltimore could have happened at a Pumpkin Festival in Connecticut or Ohio State National Championship celebration by students. There have been riots for 200 years, there are going to be many more riots and you are right, the 2016 election won’t change anything. There is no reason really to put any faith in any politician.
So we’re operating under the Unreasonable Woman standard then. Why? Who else would vote for all this nonsense.
The ones who matter the least? Kids.
Whether it is gay marriage (sick) bringing them into the world with a parent missing or the child support system removing one of the parents they starts out with.
“Government can NOT make a boy born in a fatherless home to a never-married mom SOCIALLY EQUAL to a boy born in a wedlocked home. There is no amount of money that can adjust for this no matter how much you and I want to think there is. This is doubly true for daughters born under similar circumstances.”
Less competition for legacy kids, then. Trustfunders need all the help they can get, since greatness notoriously skips a generation.
Cane,
“applied to their own lives”
Hold on, let me clean off the keyboard. Good one, Cane, good one.
MarcusD,
“To me it seems like the latter – in particular, a very unfortunate example of the Law of Unintended Consequences.”
Fortune? No.
This was sin with a side of hubris.
Dalrock proves himself a more competent sociologist than most sociologists, once again.
The redefinition of “father” goes along with redefining “marriage”.
Why do feminists hate paternity so much? They really, really dislike the idea of a father’s genes mattering for him to actually raise a child that’s half his.
@John Nesteutes
Leftism ultimately is about the hatred of the father.
@infowarrior1
Sounds rooted in hatred for our Father, God, who is male and asserts paternity over all of us.
Well, since the entire narrative of Freddie-as-victim has now changed (as it did with Michael Brown in Ferguson, Mo.), the tone of discussion needs a change. That aside, Dalrock, is my assumption that a White man (or woman) flailing away on the street at their teenage son would be arrested for child abuse or domestic violence absurd? Seriously, that was assault and battery on her child, how does feminism and the press cheer this woman? She’s the one that has children and no husband and utterly failed as a mother and woman. Then she takes to public assault and battery and is deified? Man, we live in interesting times. You guys are right. Enjoy the decline folks.
Important post here, Dalrock.
I find I am noticing more of this “disposable father syndrome” in TV shows and movies. Did anyone else find that taking the red pill made much of popular culture unpalatable?
@ seriouslyserving: For sure, it totally opens one’s eyes to the sickness in much of popular culture today…
The black community has multiple issues in play. Racial politics, feminism, and the icing on the cake African American culture. All are enter twined to create primarily a democratic voting block.
The media who are trying to make Baltimore about race are really just capitalizing on the ignorance of many. Baltimore is ~80% black, the city council and mayor are black, the chief of police is black, and at least half of not more of the cops are black. Baltimore isn’t Ferguson. It’s low income blacks against “bougie” blacks, to a large degree. But that didn’t fit the script soooo instead they portray it as another Ferguson, and of course “Black, Inc.” is happy enough for that to be the narrative.
———
Yes when you take the red pill, you can’t swallow the cultural nonsense as easily. Not just TV however. Even in corporate meetings and presentations, these same silly falsehoods are repeated incessantly without any real thought as to whether they are actually true. Sheep are sheep, plain and simple.
Watching “The Natural” , the baseball movie from I think 1984, last night. In once scene, Glenn Close’s character tells Redford’s that she thinks her son “is at the time when he really needs his father.” Redford (who doesn’t know he is actually the father) responds something to the effect of, ” Well, yeah. Fathers are important. A father can make all the difference.” I was amazed. No way that line makes it into a mainstream movie today.
Oh right, men gets hit by unruly mom… women hardest hit! For fuck sake, stop it. Stop saying daughters are worse off when they’re not.
That is the whole point you see. If they can label you as father to children you didn’t father, well then, they can also take money from you with respect of ‘child support’. That’s the real reason they want to expand all men to be fathers.
@fermentilizer
“Well, yeah. Fathers are important. A father can make all the difference.”
Wow, that is a great line!
My husband and I started watching Terra Nova the other week, and had to stop 3 episodes in because it turned out to be full of “Mum is the one holding this family together” type crap. I think the third episode had the husband competing with another man for his wife’s affections, and her ultimately “choosing” her husband. It was too much for my husband to take, and he doesn’t even know about red pill!
Years ago, that would have been the kind of show I’d have revelled in.
Under our current family system fathers are a sort of deputy parent. Just like a sheriff’s deputy serves at the pleasure of the sheriff, a father in an intact family serves at the pleasure of the mother.
I think it’s even worse than that. In a mother-headed household, the deputies are the children, and the father has a status roughly equal to that of the family horse – (usually) beloved, but with no right to any say in family matters.
Contrast that with a father-headed household, where the head’s deputy is the mother, and both parents rank above the children. This arrangement is preferable not only for biblical reasons, but also humanitarian ones.
thedeclineandfall,
“I detest both parties. American Men have nobody but themselves representing their own interests anymore.”
During the 2012 election when Todd Akin said that their was a difference between “rape” and “real rape”, did you defend him? Did you write a blog post or letter to the editor defending him?
I did not see any manosphere blogs defending him. Anecdotal of course, I don’t read every blog.
…The media and civil authorities would be outraged if there were video of the young man’s father whooping his son’s ass up and down the street
Like Adrian Peterson, for example.
I don’t know if this counts as a mainstream movie, but in the first Jesse Stone TV movie with Tom Selleck made by CBS in about 2005, he tells a woman that it’s not good that her daughter hates her dad, because “Fathers are important.” The father he’s talking about is a dirtbag criminal that he recently kicked in the crotch and knows he’s probably going to have to kill; but he still points out that a child needs her father, even if he’s a bad guy.
But yeah, I was surprised to hear that in a fairly recent show. It might have come directly from the book (much of the dialogue does), but they could have cut it out. Selleck is one of the few people in Hollywood who wouldn’t.
@seriouslyserving
Swallowing the red pill did make a later decision on my part to not watch TV/movies a lot more palatable.
There’s really no reason to bother with anything much after the 1960s. Or at all.
I think there’s a significant difference between stopping a rioting teen and whipping a five year old until he bleeds…
I think there’s a significant difference between stopping a rioting teen and whipping a five year old until he bleeds…
And that significant difference being: “Mother of the year” vs “child abuser that gets suspended from his job for a year”.
Or the significant difference could be this: mother of rioting son did not parent/discipline said son until he was rioting vs. Adrian Peterson’s son, having been disciplined for poor behavior, will not be a rioter when he grows up.
@Bee
No. I didn’t follow his election. It is hard enough holding my nose to vote for the trash in my own state’s elections let alone follow politicians in every state.
When I hear politicians speak it is like hearing a grown-up on a Charlie Brown cartoon, “Wah Wah Wah Wah”. It is just easier on my ears to completely shut out their inane repetitive talking points.
I don’t think it really matters anymore who you elect. The rulebooks aren’t really written by elected officials but by competing wealthy special interests groups that buy elections. I moved past the “D” and “R” thing long ago and just observe the decline.
You’re correct of course. It should flogging round the fleet for any 4 or 5 year old who squabbles with a sibling or spills a cup of milk.
@James K wrote,
“I think it’s even worse than that. In a mother-headed household, the deputies are the children, and the father has a status roughly equal to that of the family horse – (usually) beloved, but with no right to any say in family matters.”
Very accurate analogy, the family horse. Feminism indeed wants to take “Old Dad” out back to shoot once he can no longer work so they can sell him to a glue factory.
@Femertilizer
SD is right. So Peterson disciplined his son imperfectly. So what? Has any father done so perfectly? Why is it your preference to nitpick against one of the 1-in-3 black dudes actually disciplining his own child? Is the child dead, disfigured, or otherwise permanently harmed in a discernible way?
You seem to have the same priorities on the NFL.
https://canecaldo.wordpress.com/2014/10/14/national-fools-league/
You’re correct of course. It should flogging round the fleet for any 4 or 5 year old who squabbles with a sibling or spills a cup of milk.
I’m not suggesting Peterson should be hailed as a “father of the year” for how or why he disciplined his son. There’s plenty I don’t understand about that due to cultural differences. What is painfully clear is that Peterson is a black father and his disciplinary choices (while perhaps misguided) are regulated/judged/disrespected and subject to public humiliation by the mother of the child – as a black father, he doesn’t matter.
Whereas this mother’s behavior is deemed acceptable and approved of by the media. As a parent with a clue, evidence of failure was that her son lied to her and joined in the rioting. Belligerently slapping around a sixteen-year-old on camera who is bigger than her and of the temperament to throw bricks at cops isn’t wise – she’s fortunate he still holds an ounce of respect for her and didn’t use his greater physical ability to hurt her which he easily could have done. She admits she “just lost it” – since when is “just losing it” a good parental discipline technique? But the media celebrates her.
Yeah, if that “Mother of the Year” didn’t make her son bleed, it was from lack of strength, not lack of intention.
The question is, how would a man be viewed in the same situation as that woman? I think he’d be treated better than Peterson, because this kid is older and a criminal. He might also get some benefit of the doubt because people feel defeated and desperate about the rioting. But he wouldn’t be lauded the way this woman is.
“While HHS says any man currently shacking up with mom counts as the father, the Census says any man currently shacking up with mom counts as the father so long as mom says so. Either way, fathers clearly can’t matter that much to the US government if distinguishing between the actual father and the man currently banging mom isn’t important.”
That is a completely telling sentence Dalrock. The fact biological fathers are considered statistically insignificant by the government exactly explains what society thinks of them. That brings me to mind about an absurd Guardian article I commented on.
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/apr/10/why-do-we-never-worry-about-mens-childlessness-infertility?utm_hp_ref=women&ir=Women
“It’s all well and good to know fertility and family statistics, but I find it a bit curious that this kind of data is only ever gathered about women. Aren’t men living their lives without children, too?”
These people are simply absurd.
@SD @CC
Having spent several years working with abused/neglected children of many races I consider you both to be idiots on the subject.
That being said, the NFL is lead by a feckless moron who is paid to pander to special interest groups rather than operate the league so as to deliver the best possible product.
@Femertilizer
Men would do well to ignore watching other men play organised sports, and instead go outside and play sports themselves.
I realise this is a bitter pill to swallow, but there’s absolutely nothing to be gained from our sports entertainment culture of watching men in pink shoes play football and drinking American adjunct lagers which make you fat.
Going outside and playing some rugby or some flag football will boost your T levels, sitting on the couch doesn’t.
Having spent several years working with abused/neglected children of many races I consider you both to be idiots on the subject.
I’ll see your argument from authority and ad hominem and raise you one lad di dah. Cheers!
@Femertilizer
Oh, right. Sure you did, and sure we are.
In other news: Baseless claims online rose by 11% in the fourth quarter.
@Femertilizer
I completely agree. Roger Goodspell is a wind-up toy Chimp with Symbols that makes over $44 million dollars a year. He is the poster boy for the “death of meritocracy”.
@thedeclineandfall
Jessica Valenti is being obtuse by not mentioning the fact that men’s infertility is completely different from women’s; it doesn’t decline with age in a significant fashion, and if it is poor, it’s generally untreatable. There isn’t the equivalent of IVF with a mother’s own eggs.
She is not ignorant of these matters. She is being intellectually dishonest.
@Femertilizer
Preventing “child abuse” has been raised up as some overarching good that is such an urgent priority that it’s acceptable to throw anything else out to solve it. I’m guessing this comes out of a Freudian analysis that everything wrong you do is an adult is actually because of some complex you got as a child.
The government is quite ineffective at actually doing anything about child abuse, either. The proper people to deal with it are parents, relatives, and church authority. For children who have none of these things… it’s just a problem that won’t be easily solved.
I’ve done my share of working with abused/neglected children as well, so don’t bother pulling that trump card on me.
Personally, I consider not using physical discipline to be child abuse.
Actually on topic, responding to @seriouslyserving:
I just watched the otherwise silly popcorn movie “Into The Storm”, basically a reboot of “Twister” with more slam-bang FX (literally). “Casablanca” it isn’t, of course, but it had one redeeming feature: the lead characters were two teenage boys and their widowed DAD. Who acts like a DAD. Maybe a little too controlling(!) too. NOT a single mom, as would usually be the case. Now why widowed? Because in high concept movies like this, the less # of characters, the easier it is to write. And with “mom” dead you get a little bit of pathos in between the flying buildings sob sob. They could have done divorced mom but that wouldn’t give you the sob sob.
@CC
You are correct on both counts. I have performed dozens of admissions assessments that involved documenting the bruises, scars, and burn marks on children admitted to our facilities, both in the ER and in residential settings. I have called CPS and been present when the police arrived to question and sometimes take into custody the parents of some of these children. While I do not have to justify myself to you internet nobodies, I do so hoping to instruct you pompous, ignorant buffoons without having to resort to physical discipline. Though I would do so gladly, with a tire iron. I’ve seen the results, so I have an idea how to go about it.
I’ll leave it at that, as I make it a policy not to argue with fools.
@rover77
Interesting hypothesis. Seems plausible to me.
@ John N.
I am not opposed to a swat on the hiney to get a young child’s attention and have found it to be effective with my own kids on occasion.
I am not playing any trump cards. I am merely instructing some ignorant doofuses.
Your last post and many of your previous posts have shown me that you are not to be taken seriously, so I’ll just be skimming past any of your comments in the future.
@John Nesteutes
I agree. Jessica Valenti is quite intellectually dishonest. She is hypocritical to complain about tracking fertility on women given the the lack of mandated paternity testing and societal contempt of fathers. Her argument boils down to “I don’t like it when demographic data scrutinizes sluts on their slutty behavior.”
Continuing the theme of evil men and women’s inability to use the English language without butchering it, father has come to mean something entirely different.
Translation from Shadow English to English: Father = Any live-in fool on the hook supporting a woman’s bastards or his own biological children at the pleasure of a matriarch breeder.
Femertilizer – I am not playing any trump cards. I am merely instructing some ignorant doofuses.
Yet here you are tooting your own horn and sounding like an ignorant doofus. I wonder how you define “abuse”. I wonder how many families you assisted CPS in holding their children hostage. Now there’s a lucrative industry.
https://cbliss.wordpress.com/
http://educate-yourself.org/cn/cpscorruption15aug13.shtml
Feel free to skip my posts as well.
@Femertilizer
That would be extraordinarily ambitious of you.
@JDG
Think of all the low-rent instruction you will miss from Femertilizer. Here’s hoping you find a way to somehow cope with the loss of numbskullery.
Making a “single mother” of six(!) our hero and example of child rearing just shows how screwed up and perverse our culture has become. She’s not part of the solution, she’s a big part of the problem. How many biological fathers are involved in making six babies I wonder? Couldn’t she have restrained herself to being a single mother of two or three rather than six? Can you imagine the chaos at home? My sympathy is with this women’s children. They never had a chance.
@Femertilizer
“Oh, won’t someone think of the children!”
I believe the best way to prevent child abuse is to support and raise up true Christian men and women to marry and raise godly families in the church.
I think Big Daddy Government is pretty ineffective at preventing child abuse.
The statistics bear me out: child abuse is rampant where there aren’t residential married biological fathers in the home. Child abuse is rare where they are.
@Regular Guy
Perhaps we should use the term “baby daddy”, which I generally have understood the speaker to mean “the person who had sex with me and thus conceived my child” unambiguously.
Radfems wanted fathers out of the home, period. The child-support family is probably their single biggest victory. Third wavers don’t seem to understand this. They just shake their heads and are bewildered why fathers aren’t acting like completely egalitarian copies of women.
…you are right, the 2016 election won’t change anything …
The outcome has already been decided anyway; we just have no idea in whose favor it has been decided. The election is just going to be an expensive, carefully crafted piece of theater, like all of them have been in the modern era.
Seriously, that was assault and battery on her child, how does feminism and the press cheer this woman?
Why, that’s obvious – it’s because she was beating up on a MALE.
If it had been her DAUGHTER she was asswhupping, then the feminazis would be screaming for the formation of a lynch mob.
Cail Corishev: how would a man be viewed in the same situation as that woman? I think he’d be treated better than Peterson, because this kid is older and a criminal. He might also get some benefit of the doubt because people feel defeated and desperate about the rioting. But he wouldn’t be lauded the way this woman is.
True. But also, just as female disciplinarians are viewed better than male disciplinarians, black disciplinarians are viewed better than white disciplinarians.
Ever notice that tough black fathers are, sometimes, lauded by the media? In the 1980s, The Cosby Show stood out for its portrayal of a strong, wise father. Cosby’s character did at times defer to his brilliant wife, but he was not the buffoonish dad that sitcoms were (and are) so full of.
I think it’s partially because white audiences, tired of the societal costs of black dysfunction, yearn to see black families “get their act together.” And partially it’s because whites think it might be racist to portray black men negatively.
Spike Lee has even identified a similar trope: the Magical Negro: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magical_Negro
As for the “reason why it is done”, this varies based on the person.
There are some true ideologues who are social revolutionaries. They are indeed looking to overturn the entire family order in order to disempower men, because men who are empowered as fathers tend to create a patriarchal system. You can’t have patriarchy without the actual sire of the children having “hard” rights relating to them. This doesn’t follow naturally but must be socially/legally imposed. It’s the lynchpin of patriarchy, such that if you remove it by taking away hard rights of fathers, you basically make patriarchy impossible. So from the perspective of these people, removing the rights of fathers is critical to destroying patriarchy and ensuring it does not re-emerge.
For the average person, however, this is not what is going on. For the average person, this is the product of a mixture of the following: going along to get along; not wanting to be seen as judgmental; valuing freedom in an almost extreme sense; and anecdotes of “bad guys” in the lives of their female family members or friends . they’re not revolutionary types — they’re regular folks who don’t like to be seen as outlier . That’s how the needle was moved so quickly on gay marriage by the way — the advocates reached a tipping point and then the social pressure began not to be an outdated outlier on the issu . So most people rolled on the issue in the space of a couple of years — without question the fastest radical social revolution in the history of the species.
The needle didn’t move nearly as quickly on the issues relating to men and fathers, but happened over the course of a few decades. The same dynamic was at play, but the speed differed, probably because most of that process took place well before Internet 2.0 and the rise of social media, both of which have provided extremely powerful tools to “outlier-ize” a majority and displace it’s views with that of a smaller, radical group.
seriouslyserving said:
My husband and I started watching Terra Nova the other week, and had to stop 3 episodes in because it turned out to be full of “Mum is the one holding this family together” type crap. I think the third episode had the husband competing with another man for his wife’s affections, and her ultimately “choosing” her husband. It was too much for my husband to take, and he doesn’t even know about red pill! Years ago, that would have been the kind of show I’d have revelled in
Yep. The rot has permeated the entire Anglosphere. Shows like what you describe were, until not very long ago, limited here in the U.S. to a couple of cable channels like Lifetime or LMN, which cater to a female audience. Now they’re ubiquitous on all channels (one reason why I’m about to scale back, if not altogether cancel, my DirecTV subscription). Another real irony is that I’ve seen programs of the sort you describe broadcast on channels that are interspersed with advertisements for MEN’s products.
God help us.
To follow up my response to seriouslyserving, another irony is that on channels like BET (which cater to Black audiences), there have been sitcoms that actually portray the opposite of SWPL programs and show black men as strong husbands and fathers. The Cosby Show was the most famous example, with Fresh Prince of Bel Aire and Family Matters being two other prominent ones. Of course the reason is “PC,” but the cognitive dissonance of Hollywood attempting to portray as good and noble that which it is actively attempting to destroy through its political endorsements simply boggles the logical mind.
The statistics bear me out: child abuse is rampant where there aren’t residential married biological fathers in the home.
We really need to be careful with statistics because many sources turn out to be from people who re-define the meaning of key words like “abuse”. Yes real abuse does exist, but these days the term “abuse” can mean just about anything. I know of folks who think spanking is abuse.
…you are right, the 2016 election won’t change anything …
The outcome has already been decided anyway; we just have no idea in whose favor it has been decided. The election is just going to be an expensive, carefully crafted piece of theater, like all of them have been in the modern era.
I have come to this conclusion as well. I don’t care anymore except in how it will affect any related future decisions I need to make (like if or when to leave the country).
The Cosby Show stood out for its portrayal of a strong, wise father. Cosby’s character did at times defer to his brilliant wife, but he was not the buffoonish dad that sitcoms were (and are) so full of.
My memories of that show are such that the father always deferred to the wife. He wasn’t portrayed as a buffoon, but he was 2nd in command. For a better TV example one needs to go back to “Father Knows Best”, or “Leave it to Beaver”.
Femertilizer kookfarted:
Impotent death threats, issued from behind a computer screen, by an anonymous nobody.
Just another day in the androsphere.
Boxer
@Cane
Ambitious? Hardly. I’m sure it’d be no trouble at all. Editing my full comment to suit your purpose… classic.
@JDG
How do I define abuse? Maybe you missed the “bruises, scars and burn marks” part of my previous? We know that young kids fall down. Skinned/bruised knees or elbows are not indicative of abuse on their own. TEN-4 and other assessment tools help us to differentiate between normal bumps and bruises and something more worrisome.
Not sure where you live, but here licensed practitioners are legally required to report all finding consistent with or suspicious of abuse/neglect.
As for your links; are your telling me there are some bad actors in the government bureaucracies? Inconceivable! But I bet you still pay your taxes every year even if you’re not 1000% behind every government law or policy.
If I have offended anyone here, too effing bad. My clinical detachment fails when the ignorant talk out of turn on this topic.
Pots and kettles boxer…
[Jessica Valenti’s] argument boils down to “I don’t like it when demographic data scrutinizes sluts on their slutty behavior.”
That’s all the “argument” anyone from a privileged class needs when they write for an “establishment’ organ. Consider the readership, and it makes more sense.
How many biological fathers are involved in making six babies I wonder?
Probably at least twelve.
@Femertilize
You said you were going to “leave it at that”, but yet you return to me. (Is it so hard to quit the Caldo?) While your use of the word “editing” is technically accurate, it’s also loaded, and therefore misleading. Let’s add to this that at the drop of a comment you threaten violence against persons unknown to you for reasons unclear to anyone and by means too remote for you to achieve.
In brief: You lack integrity. It’s no wonder you find yourself hostile in these environs.
Seriouslyserving,
I find I am noticing more of this “disposable father syndrome” in TV shows and movies. Did anyone else find that taking the red pill made much of popular culture unpalatable?
Even more annoying to me are the Christian ministries who decry that and then badger the men from all angles for doing too much to provide for their family and not keeping their wife happy. The ones who should be standing for righteousness have given it up.
Femertilizer,
You have no idea the harm done in the name of preventing “child abuse”. Label normal parenting abuse so we can end up with more uncontrolled hoodlums. That is the answer….
NOTE: Equating anything more than a light slap on the rear as abuse is the problem. Give a horrid word picture without any context or clarity and then claim all physical discipline is abuse. That is being very dishonest, but it goes with his views.
SD,
She admits she “just lost it” – since when is “just losing it” a good parental discipline technique? But the media celebrates her.
I find that many who decry corporal punishment fall into that camp. They tolerate until their meter is full, then they loose it. They still decry those who attempt a proper balance.
Said Femertilizer:
Having spent several years working with abused/neglected children of many races I consider you both to be idiots on the subject.
He was probably one of the ones like those who made my life trying to raise 4 children from a VERY dysfunctional background a living hell once they learned how to play the system. I was horrid because I kept their base instincts under control. They are so much better off now following the patterns of their birth family. Yeah right.
I could go into details, but then I would get blamed for causing that, not the birth family that laid the corrupted groundwork.
Idiots.
Femertilizer,
I do so hoping to instruct you pompous, ignorant buffoons without having to resort to physical discipline. Though I would do so gladly, with a tire iron. I’ve seen the results, so I have an idea how to go about it.
Go ahead and try it. You may not like the results on your own body. But then you have the power of the state to enforce your violence and you revel in it. You are a wicked, evil person who wraps himself in claims or doing good.
I’ll leave it at that, as I make it a policy not to argue with fools.
I guess you are the only fool allowed into arguments you start then.
feeriker,
I like the Cosby show, but even he was a bumbler when compared against his wife. I do not believe she ever made a “bad call” on the show.
Cane,
I have been a bit of a wimp in the past (covered by the fact I don’t look like a wimp), but meeting someone like Femertilizer in a dark alley would be a potential temptation. I suspect I would react more with scorn, but he is one I would avoid because I would be very tempted to do ungodly things to him since he (she?) proudly boasts of doing the things that disrupted my attempts to raise a group of troubled children.
They think they no more than everyone else and yet have not walked a minute in the shoes of someone who has really been on the front lines.
Please. This is some nobody on the internet, jerking y’alls chain and watching the dance. She probably works nights at a convenience store.
@Boxer
How long until we are accused of being virgins, overweight, fulsome, and finding residence in the cellar of our mother’s dwelling?
Dear John:
That’ll all happen right after Madame Doktor exposes my micropenis. (It’s small, admittedly, but it’s all mine!)
Boxer
@Infowarrior1
“@John Nesteutes
Leftism ultimately is about the hatred of the father.”
I would disagree, it’s too narrow a definition. It’s more like a political byproduct of a culture that embraces the worship of the self.
Dear RG & JN:
In the contemporary context, I don’t know what “leftism” is, exactly. It’s one of those manosphere catch-alls like “Cultural Marxism” (lol) that has never been well defined.
I do think that feminism is about hatred of the father, though, and I think that’s a particularly concise way to define feminism. Jung wrote about females and the father complex. I should dig up some of that old stuff.
Boxer
@Boxer: lol indeed at “Cultural Marxism”.
@Regular Guy: one of the problems in our culture is the complete dedication to individualism (or the perception of that). The idea that a higher authority can restrict your choices in areas like recreation or attire is anathema.
The worship of the self means the self can do no wrong, including appearing in public unclothed, and attempts to cover such nakedness are “purity culture” and “slut shaming”.
they blame men but they don’t blame those single moms for raising those kids to be rioters & they don’t blame those single moms for choosing to have children with men who don’t stick around.
@BradA
I don’t think we have any reason to believe any of this Fem’s claims; including statements about previous work.
Bradford,
“Making a “single mother” of six(!) our hero and example of child rearing just shows how screwed up and perverse our culture has become.”
She is not our hero nor is that our culture. We still have a country, such as it is, with a global empire attached to it, but we no longer have a common culture.
The fools cheering this woman do so because it is yet another example of a female violently humiliating and degrading a male. This is exciting to white females watching because females humiliating males is usually more of a white thing, and violence more of a black male thing. Creating the Other in their own image is a favorite pastime of those who have forsaken God and now worship themselves.
@desiderian: it’s certainly not *my* culture.
I question how much we should even watch these kind of video reports. It’s all pozzed anyway. You can only watch so much before you start to think like them.
@Desi
Real-talk. That sentiment is definitely mixed into the news coverage.
Femertilizer says:
April 30, 2015 at 12:16 pm
@JDG
How do I define abuse? Maybe you missed the “bruises, scars and burn marks” part of my previous? We know that young kids fall down. Skinned/bruised knees or elbows are not indicative of abuse on their own.
Genuine cases of child abuse should be handled by someone other than government funded bureaucrats. My friends and I growing up had skins, bruises, and stubbed toes pretty regularly. In addition, I’ve acquired a few scars and even suffered a couple of burns in my growing up years, of which none were at the hands of my parents.
Bruises or welts were pretty common for many of us after having done something despicable and received our just rewards. No one called it “abuse” back then and I see no reason to change it now in spite of the a PC generated new “morality”. Putting it bluntly, IMO you and your bureaucratic friends are a bunch of PC enabled sissies who for the most part use the police and courts to bully families that don’t follow your idea of parenting.
TEN-4 and other assessment tools help us to differentiate between normal bumps and bruises and something more worrisome.
As if feminist bureaucrats are going to know the difference.
Not sure where you live, but here licensed practitioners are legally required to report all finding consistent with or suspicious of abuse/neglect.
Of course you are. How else are these crooks going to get funding? They define what is “consistent with or suspicious of abuse/neglect” and you report it so they can get there piece of the pie at the families expense. How wonderful for you..
As for your links; are your telling me there are some bad actors in the government bureaucracies?
That’s like saying there were a few small leaks on the Titanic.
But I bet you still pay your taxes every year even if you’re not 1000% behind every government law or policy.
As if we have a choice that doesn’t include wage garnishment or prison.
If I have offended anyone here, too effing bad. My clinical detachment fails when the ignorant talk out of turn on this topic.
I don’t mind being offended. I get it, your an egotistical jerk. I just wish you didn’t spout so much indoctrinated ignorance.
By blurring the line between biological fathers, adopting fathers, step-fathers and mama’s live in boyfriend they’re setting the stage for making any/all financially liable. It’s as simple as that. When the government largesse stops due to an economic implosion, they’ll want to make sure that the financial liability for every woman and their children will be passed on to some man, or as many men as possible. The biological father might pay child support, the 3 year live in boyfriend might be required to pay their health insurance and the current step-dad for the rest.
If men have not thought about potential legal entanglements before, they should now, given that marriage rates are so low. Men have always been required to fund government and women and diving marriage rates won’t stop that train from rolling. Don’t be one of the low hanging fruit, because they’ll get whacked first, and hardest.
@ Boxer & JN
Modern day leftism doesn’t seem to adhere any social structure or theory of governance outside of what is immediately expedient to it’s goal. Modern days leftists are a coalition of “Takers” who will not (or cannot) subject themselves to the social understanding that in order to receive, one must produce to trade in kind.
These people include all those who intellectually or physically cannot produce commensurate with their need (the handicapped) and those who WILL NOT produce commensurate with their desires (the feckless spawn of the ruling class, most minorities, white trash, the largest corporations in America and government parasites [hired or elected]). The latter tend tend to soft and damaged emotionally, hence the addiction to laissez faire cultural norms, but have a mortal fear of death (their own) due to material obsession, hence the hoplophobia and safety fascism.
It’s only goal is to acquire power and resources. All other academic noise is purely for aesthetics. As a right-wing “nutter” just to the right of Genghis Khan, I find myself in agreement with Boxer (LOL! Ikr?) that modern day leftism is indescribable in any terms aside from being nothing more than a power grab by “Takers”.
@Alex
I had thought about that, but while I think there is always a desire to loop in more beta bucks suckers, I think this is more basic. This comes from the desire to remove the (remaining) stigma of broken homes. The status of marriage, especially marriage to the father of your children, is the most powerful force holding marriage/families together today. Obviously in large numbers of cases this force isn’t strong enough, but nevertheless it is the most powerful one today. The government has placed a cash bounty on the head of every father. Christians instead of holding to morality are instead loudly cheering this on. So force of law, and religious morality are gone entirely as a restraining force. This goes after the one remaining obstacle to the full and unfettered embrace of serial monogamy.
Cracked is rebuilding the mound, sort of:
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-reasons-gay-marriage-traditional-marriage/
Things aren’t so bad after all, they are telling you.
Dalrock
Nowhere else–nowhere–is there commentary on these issues as insightful as yours. Thank you. I greatly hope that someday your writings get read by the policymakers who need to see them. Have you considered submitting an op-ed piece to a major newspaper?–e.g. WSJ or WaPo.
P.S. to my post above, I can’t believe I overlooked “women” not being included in the “Taker” coalition, lol.
Another thought: It makes sense in the era of nihilistic post-modernism that “Leftism” doesn’t really stand for any abstract ideas anymore, despite claims to the contrary, outside of the acquisition of power and resources. Mainstream culture has denigrated the concept of truth so all that’s left is “I want what I want and I want it right the f*ck now!”.
This insanity will not stop if the producers cannot break their addiction to the hollow promises of the “American Dream”. What used to be a call for those with no opportunities to change the destiny of their lineage has been cheapened to a house-to-big-to-afford, 2 to 3 automobiles, a garage filled with powersport toys and unused tools, 2.3 children in name brand clothing and memberships in the local Churchian house of worship and trendy gym.
A minimalist lifestyle in a small or tiny home, 1 economical car shared in the family, a self-sustaining, off-the-grid early retirement from the workforce and a proactive, Christ-like life lived in their local community could very well be the greatest moral, economic and political action the middle class can take for the good of this country. On the other hand, the middle class could keep showing up at work chasing that dollar until a global sovereign debt crisis brings on a collapse of legendary proportion.
I’m not kidding myself of where this is going. Proverbs 22:3 “A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished”
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excellent insight, dalrock.
my contribution:
“Under our current family system, fathers are a sort of deputy parent.”
right there. in one sentence. brilliant.
Nowhere else–nowhere–is there commentary on these issues as insightful as yours. Thank you. I greatly hope that someday your writings get read by the policymakers who need to see them. Have you considered submitting an op-ed piece to a major newspaper?–e.g. WSJ or WaPo.
I think what is more likely is 10,000 years after the collapse, archeologists will dig up the writings of Dalrock (and others) and say “well see here–some sages were warning about it, but no one listened.”
To those defending Adrian Peterson, do you realize he used a tree branch on his child and made his testicles bleed? I personally believe this was a family matter, but what he did was not acceptable. He is 6’1″ 220Ilbs and spent his free time play fighting with 350Ilb linemen. Who in his family could have stopped him? What should have been done? Im talking to Cane and Sarah’s Daughter.
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Christians instead of holding to morality are instead loudly cheering this on. So force of law, and religious morality are gone entirely as a restraining force.
For years when you would say this, I thought it was an unfair and untrue accusation. But the past couple of months I have noticed every afternoon, that our local Christian radio station plays an “encouraging” snippet released by a division of Family Life called “Family Life Blended”.
Yesterday, it was about stepmothers to his kids feeling snubbed on Mother’s Day and how wives can handle it.
Today, it was about how wives in second marriages need their husbands to reassure them that they are partners, in the thing together because she’s been hurt before. And so on…
Every day, tips and “Christian” advice on how to navigate second (or more) marriages in a “Christian” way. Stunning that they do this, basically winking at divorce and remarriage.
As for the “mother of the year”, her baby mama antics are actually quite common place and nothing to get all excited about. Really. it happens all the time, but it’s normally provoked by far less egregious offense.
She stands however, juxtaposed to all the other mothers (and some fathers) who have not been seen publicly chastising their children who are out there wreaking havoc and destroying their already depressed community.
The point is to say, “See, look! Single mothers are doing a good job, trying to teach their kids right behavior an values the best they know how without the help of the no-good fathers who sired them.”
@Joshua
It wasn’t a tree branch, it was a switch. Switches were common until Dr. Spock and his wicked tome mislead everyone.
Peterson confessed (before the press or police was even involved) that he made a mistake in whipping him too much, and also that he felt bad that he accidentally hit his son’s nuts.
If it’s a family matter, then we ought to butt out.
Sometimes fathers make mistakes. In this case, he made a mistake trying to do the right thing (spare the rod, spoil the child) in a world that is screaming at us to do the wrong thing (pretend your children are naturally perfect). The son who got the whipping was physically overbearing another kid. Do you think that was the first time? Kids are vicious to each; sometimes brutally so.
I bet the son remembers it the next time he wants to act the fool at his father’s house, and from there he will remember it when he’s out in the world.
I almost broke out and LOL’d at the bluepilled crap in this article.
http://jimdaly.focusonthefamily.com/the-mother-from-baltimore/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+JimDalyBlog+%28Blog%3A+Jim+Daly%29
Jim Daly referring to the Super Hero Du ‘Jour, Riot Mom Toya Graham:
“This viral video has served to remind us that moms and dads serve an important purpose: they protect children.
When strong parents set clear expectations for behavior and teach their kids right from wrong, those children have the best chance of growing up and becoming successful and responsible citizens.”
Bwahahahahahahaha!
“My heart breaks for moms like Toya Graham, a single mother of six. I don’t know her full story, but single parenting is one of the most challenging of all jobs.”
You’re equating a single mother’s job (whose only qualification of being a single mom is that the father(s) of her children isn’t around) to that of say… an air traffic controller? A Navy Seal? A Neurosurgeon? A police officer? What job would you equate this too in terms of “challenging”?
“If you’re a single parent, please let us know how we can help. And if there’s a single parent in your circle, please reach out to them and see how you might minister to their needs.”
If by “reaching out” you mean, “give them free shit”, no, I won’t. Enough of my earnings are siphoned from me to support these feral b*tches. The same goes for you baby boomers, to include my parents.
It is not just Fathers: the law of Primogeniture ensured that land passed to the oldest son; now one does not even have to be of the whole blood but may inherit under Intestacy rules even if a bastard: De Tocqueville thinks this facilitates Democracy.
As an oldest and legitimate son I naturally deprecate such changes.
@ Boxer says:
April 30, 2015 at 1:21 pm
“That’ll all happen right after Madame Doktor exposes my micropenis. (It’s small, admittedly, but it’s all mine!)”
Girl: Who’s that supposed to satisfy?
Boxer: Heh… me!
Sorry, dude, couldn’t resist!
Thank you for the very kind words S. Chan. I haven’t thought of submitting op ed pieces, but will give it some thought.
E,
Funny about the radio bit. That is really bad. I was thinking about FotF reminding divorcing women to not forget about the cash and prizes, as well as the RC priest who did the same on CAF. There are of course more examples of this than we could count.
It wasn’t a tree branch, it was a switch. Switches were common until Dr. Spock and his wicked tome mislead everyone.
We used to have to pick the switch off the trees ourselves. Talk about insult to injury. I never heard any talk of whipping too much, but we kids sure thought it was too much. It’s funny how we didn’t often repeat the behavior that earned us a trip to the tree in the first place.
@Fermentilzer; CaneCaldo, SeriouslyServing
These lovely, sweet, hardest-job-in-the-world having single moms are largely responsible for the continuing violence in America’s ghettos. These garbage moms are the only adult influence these kids get, yet society at large still find’s a way to blame a “deadbeat dad” who isn’t there to demonstrate this violence to the children in the first place.
“Psychologically, black men are screwed up because they fear women. This boy could have beaten his mother if he wanted too, but if he had too, he’d be considered wrong. So what we’re teaching boys is to accept being pummeled by women.” Money quote.
@Regular Guy says:
April 30, 2015 at 3:33 pm
“This insanity will not stop if the producers cannot break their addiction to the hollow promises of the ‘American Dream’… A minimalist lifestyle in a small or tiny home, 1 economical car shared in the family”
That doesn’t work for those of us with eight kids! But yeah, I understand your logic.
So what we’re teaching boys is to accept being pummeled by women.
Not from this example IMO. I’d have to say from this example we are teaching boys it’s normal and okay to grew up without a father and be pummeled by your mother.
@ JDG. Sorry if the formatting gets hinky.
@JDG
How do I define abuse? Maybe you missed the “bruises, scars and burn marks” part of my previous? We know that young kids fall down. Skinned/bruised knees or elbows are not indicative of abuse on their own.
Genuine cases of child abuse should be handled by someone other than government funded bureaucrats.
Who?
My friends and I growing up had skins, bruises, and stubbed toes pretty regularly. In addition, I’ve acquired a few scars and even suffered a couple of burns in my growing up years, of which none were at the hands of my parents.
I pretty much said that. Were any of the burns the same size and shape as a cigarette or cigar tip? Were they on your back/buttocks or other areas normally clothed and not generally exposed to high heat sources?
Bruises or welts were pretty common for many of us after having done something despicable and received our just rewards. No one called it “abuse” back then and I see no reason to change it now in spite of the a PC generated new “morality”. Putting it bluntly, IMO you and your bureaucratic friends are a bunch of PC enabled sissies who for the most part use the police and courts to bully families that don’t follow your idea of parenting.
I am healthcare provider working at private hospital system. I do not work for the state, however, I am required to follow state regulations or my license to practice will be revoked. If our facility fails to follow guidelines the state and CMS can reduce or deny payment, we might then close and/or reduce services and the ambulance can then take you to the local veterinarian for treatment. My parents took a belt to me on more than one occasion; I do not consider what they did abuse. However, I never required medical attention after such discipline, and there were no lasting marks to be discovered if I fell off my bike the next week.
As for being a PC sissy; I know you’ve made up your mind already, but I could say some things like: I own several guns and aim to get my concealed carry permit this year. I voted straight Republican since I was 18 until I realized that we’re basically under one-party rule at the present. If I had the power of Napoleon, I would halt all immigration into this country for at least 30 years and deport all illegal immigrants. I would build fences north and south and have the Army patrolling the borders. I would also move to halt automatic citizenship for children of non-citizens born on American soil. I would shrink the federal government to 1/10th its current size as a starting point. I would re-establish our manufacturing base, and work to bring back viable family farms. There would never be a drone active in American airspace but to help patrol the borders.
TEN-4 and other assessment tools help us to differentiate between normal bumps and bruises and something more worrisome.
As if feminist bureaucrats are going to know the difference.
We do not barge into your home to kidnap your children. Medical professionals examine children brought in for treatment. Only after a trained professional believes there is evidence of abuse is the state/CPS contacted. We are not the FBI. We do not manufacture false evidence to steal your kids from you. You got problems with state-employed social workers; take it up with one of them.
Not sure where you live, but here licensed practitioners are legally required to report all finding consistent with or suspicious of abuse/neglect.
Of course you are. How else are these crooks going to get funding? They define what is “consistent with or suspicious of abuse/neglect” and you report it so they can get there piece of the pie at the families expense. How wonderful for you..
See my earlier about hospitals closing if not following state/CMS guidelines. You obviously have no concept of how reliant healthcare facilities are on government payments. I’ve been informed that it’s about 2/3s of revenue. The most frightening words a hospital administrator can hear are: “State/CMS is here for a surprise inspection.” I would be thrilled if we could go back to a straight private pay fee for service model, get rid of a bunch of the bullshit and keep government out of healthcare, but that’s not the primary argument here.
As for your links; are your telling me there are some bad actors in the government bureaucracies?
That’s like saying there were a few small leaks on the Titanic.
You left off the “Inconceivable.” from my comment for some reason. Was the sarcasm too subtle?
But I bet you still pay your taxes every year even if you’re not 1000% behind every government law or policy.
As if we have a choice that doesn’t include wage garnishment or prison.
At 2/3s revenue, healthcare facilities don’t have a choice either.
If I have offended anyone here, too effing bad. My clinical detachment fails when the ignorant talk out of turn on this topic. I am going to append that I REALLY TRULY don’t understand what you people are thinking. Again, do I think there are some bad actors in CPS/government? Yes I do. Government workers are people, and some people are straight-up evil. But again how many of you have direct experience of working with these children. Are you saying there is no such thing ass child abuse by a parent? You can try to disqualify my clinical experiences as you wish, but that doesn’t make the real cases of abuse go away. Sorry I got upset about people defending whipping a child until he bleeds. I’ll do better. I promise. Please don’t hit me again, Daddy.
I don’t mind being offended. I get it, your an egotistical jerk. I just wish you didn’t spout so much indoctrinated ignorance.
Your ignorance of how healthcare and the regulations it must work under in this country is astonishing for someone who wanted to put in their two cents. I don’t know what your personal experience has been, but you really don’t seem to see the bigger picture here.
Talking of domestic violence ..
Vader: “Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.”
Luke: “He told me enough! He told me you killed him!”
Vader: “No, I am your father.”
And look what happened to him, the evil old bastard. Must have owed like half a solar system in back-payments.
That Baltimore breeder must have a really good job to afford six children, all on her own-i-o. Re-speck!
It is not about right or left anymore. The dominant world ideology is FI.
Yes.
Indeed even in non-political settings this is the case.
I was attending a large conference for executives of my F200 this week, and during the presentation from the (of course Gen X 40s female) HR person, she was talking about cultivating relationships for hiring and she made an explicit reference to how the idea was like dating: (paraphrasing): “You know, it’s like dating. You have some guys on the front burner who are like the top candidates and then some on the back burner, you know, just in case, to keep your options open and maintain a relationship with all of them”.
Yep, there you have it — AF/BB, orbiters and so on, all being used to sell HR strategies in a totally non-political (at least not expressly so) corporate setting, and of course, there were a lot of female heads in the audience nodding as far as I could see.
Open hypergamy is a real thing guys — Rollo is NOT making this up. It’s becoming more brazen every day, and not just in media.
I wonder if fatherhood in a refrigerator can survive the desires of the feminine imperative.
http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/sofia-vergaras-nick-loeb-pens-op-ed-fight/story?id=30699157
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Dalrock @ 2:47 pm:
“… while I think there is always a desire to loop in more beta bucks suckers, I think this is more basic. This comes from the desire to remove the (remaining) stigma of broken homes.”
Going even more basic, redefining words can be a religious statement. Homosexuals used to ask why Christians were so upset about homosexual marriage when it wasn’t hurting anybody. The answer was they were changing the definition of marriage from “man and wife” to “a pair of currently willing adults”, which is not what marriage is. They might as well force Christians to deny Christ as force Christians to accept as truth what is obviously a lie because the reason we worship Christ in the first place is because he’s the True God, not because.he’s the Useful God.
Similarly, a gov’t that equates “father” with “current boyfriend” for taxes and feelgood is like a man who equates “cell phone” with “coworker” so he can drive in the carpool lane. What is superficially about semantics is actually the conceit that universal truth does not exist and morality is whatever we can get away with. Which is why that man hates traffic cops so much.
Why the Elites hate Christ so much.
@TFH
Yes. That is why amidst all the articles we see about AI and automation replacing jobs and automating millions of decisions, almost no one has considered how much oxygen it will invisibly suck out of FI.
Not just the low-productivity make-work jobs that women do, but millions of small decisions all across the economy, once automated, will be stripped of the FI that humans do without noticing…
I’m not sure you correct about that. We we forced to install a new medical records system to meet with the Obamacare regulations on reporting to CMS. Almost all the similar work done before required that people (99% females) had to go to each unit and flip through paper charts to get the data. This was very time-consuming and we had lots of people doing this as their primary function. The reporting capabilities in the new system make it easy to tabulate and report this information to CMS as it all goes into the system as part of routine care. Yet, we still have all these women “working” at the hospitals. I have no idea what the heck they could be doing all day.
Fatherhood has been defined by Progressives as just that: whoever is banging your mother. It gets worse: one opinion writer in Australia defined a family member as “Someone who you share toothpaste with”. That is, no sisters, no brothers, no fathers, just a tribe of (sub)humans living with the matriarch.
Hypergamy unchained is not new: it is the defining feature of ancient civilizations, or rather non-civilizations where men did nothing for anyone besides themselves (which due to their strength, they do very easily) while women eked out a gatherer existence. We are inevitably heading that way, as the expanding welfare budget shows.
Ok, it’s confirmed. Femertilizer is an extremely argumentative woman. I don’t care how many guns she has. Only a woman could carry on as she did at 5:30 pm. She just cannot STFU.
@Dalrock
“I had thought about that, but while I think there is always a desire to loop in more beta bucks suckers, I think this is more basic. This comes from the desire to remove the (remaining) stigma of broken homes. The status of marriage, especially marriage to the father of your children, is the most powerful force holding marriage/families together today. Obviously in large numbers of cases this force isn’t strong enough, but nevertheless it is the most powerful one today. The government has placed a cash bounty on the head of every father”
===
See, but that’s what doesn’t make sense to me. By every measure, kids brought up in single mother homes under perform when compared to kids brought up in a family unit and sometimes the deficit is quite great. So how does it benefit the government to raise entire generations of under performing men, when it actually needs them to be more productive then ever, given the financial abyss which could open up under our feet?
If you’re the government you need more futures slaves, so you need people to breed in great numbers, while men from broken families often have 1/no kids. You need hard working men to bust their ass for their families, not living for themselves. It would be like wanting your wife to be slender and sexy, but encouraging her to eat chocolate eclairs instead of exercising. Yep, I know they’re importing immigrants legally and illegally, but the illegal ones, the vast majority, can’t produce the amount of wealth which could be generated by natives working for their families.
Cane, did you see the pictures? It wasnt a switch, it was a tree branch. You seem to have skimmed over where i said it was a family matter. So i say this again, Peterson is 6’1″ weighing 220 and play fights with 350 pound linemen. Did he really need a weapon(somewhat facetious here) to discipline a 6 yr old. Also did he know what he did was wrong when he did it or after he was arrested and had that fake mea culpa. Furthermore as a man with 5 kids by 5 different baby mommas do you think he has stopped sleeping with NFL groupies and producing children. Ill ask you again, what would you do if that was your brother?
Boxer, having a run in with CPS colors my view of such things, even if this is full troll.
I suppose that is one of my weak spots.
Note that I did have a social worker (years after the fact) tell me that she was on my children’s original removal from their birth home and that it was the only time she was glad to have removed them. We saw enough in our children when they came with us to know they had some rough pasts. We had no idea on the long term impact though and CPS turned on us when they hit the team years and convinced everyone that strong parenting was abuse.
Joshua, you may be right but we would be far better as a society to trust parents rather than second guess them. No one is perfect and more are harmed by CPS involvement than anything those like Peterson will ever do.
TFH says:
I know this has been said before but, I suspect that at least some FI will be included in AI. I realise that is an oxymoron but given the interest the Powers That Be have in controlling the masses, I think it will go that way. Perhaps later versions of AI [AI-2.0?] will develop into actual / reasonable intelligence, but for now I’m not so sure.
Perhaps the Chinese can produce something less tainted by FI?
One of the local broadcast stations here picked up a new channel called GRIT. Motto: “Television with Backbone.” It’s all movies for men: war movies, westerns, fight movies, classics, etc. Lots of John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, Charles Bronson, Chuck Norris, and so on. Lots of red pill messages, and I’ve even seen movies without a single female character! Overall, it’s very refreshing.
But I worry that it won’t last, because occasionally they throw in a movie that doesn’t fit. For instance, one starred Raquel Welch as a woman who becomes a gunfighter to go after the three bad guys who killed her husband and raped her. Now, she’s so hot you almost can’t care what the movie’s about, but it definitely has a Tuff Grrl message that wouldn’t be out of place on Lifetime (except they probably wouldn’t like the guns).
So I worry that it’ll gradually go that direction. Feminism is so pervasive these days that it infects everything that’s not specifically built to exclude it, and even some things that are.
TFH says:
April 30, 2015 at 7:50 pm
I agree with your market based reasoning but I recall we [humans] had no sooner invented the light bulb and laws were made to limit their life-span to 25,000 hours. Never underestimate human stupidity. I could be wrong.
What should have been done?
When the pictures of Peterson’s son’s injuries were first released, I showed my husband my arms and hands. I had been cleaning out our raspberry patch of old canes regrettably without a long sleeve shirt on. I had a few gouges worse than what is pictured of the boy’s injuries and several similar scratches. Sometimes injuries look a lot worse than they feel.
I’d have kept that in mind.
If I were the boy’s mother no one would have ever heard of the incident. I would have analyzed the situation. Peterson texted her right after it happened. He was honest with her. Peterson knew there was a scheduled doctor’s appointment coming up. He said nothing to prevent her from taking him. I would have rescheduled the appointment for after the week or two necessary for the wounds to heal. I would do this because I understand the media firestorm that would come. Out of respect for my son’s future, I would have thought for two minutes before exposing this to this insane and unreasonable society, giving it an opportunity to destroy the boy’s father’s life. I would have had a private conversation with Peterson about choosing a different disciplinary tactic. I would have then heard Peterson tell me that this was how his own father disciplined him and I would have thought about that. Now, Peterson’s father is no angel however Peterson has not been in trouble. All his life he’s been succeeding. High School, college, the pros, this man is seriously dedicated and as a result is one of the best in his chosen field. He knows how to succeed. Is it possible he knows the type of discipline young black men with single mothers might need to be successful?
I would have thought about how Peterson mourned the death of another one of his children and known there was no way his intent was to inflict undue or irreparable harm to this child.
I would have prayed. A lot. And I would have considered how important the relationship between this boy and his father is. That God’s Word is Truth and Peterson is the head of his household. I would not be the stumbling block between this boy and the respect and honor he is commanded to give his father. Having him witness the circus that was the media firestorm was horrible for this child. Much more long term damaging than the scratches on his legs. What does this child say to his father now? “You know daddy Peterson, you can’t touch me with that switch no more, you’ll go to jail…” Can you even imagine?
You can not succeed at building a society of civilized individuals by convicting men like this of flagrant acts of fatherhood.
TFH says:
April 30, 2015 at 8:21 pm
Again I agree. But please bear in mind both cars and light bulbs have been evolving for a long time now. I am suggesting the idea behind planned obsolescence hasn’t gone away, it could just evolve to included FI. Yes it might sound crazy, but given the greatness of aforementioned ‘blindspot’ it could be later called an oversight.
I believe your reasoning is correct. But I’m thinking about the political interest our governments have and how they could easily hide their malice behind the ignorance of the masses, and when exposed they can play dumb.
I am healthcare provider working at private hospital system. I do not work for the state, however, I am required to follow state regulations or my license to practice will be revoked. If our facility fails to follow guidelines the state and CMS can reduce or deny payment, we might then close and/or reduce services and the ambulance can then take you to the local veterinarian for treatment.
If you are participating in state sanctioned kidnapping of children from their fathers and mothers then I would prefer your practice (if it were yours) not be in business at all. The veterinarian looks much better by comparison.
We do not barge into your home to kidnap your children. We are not the FBI. We do not manufacture false evidence to steal your kids from you.
No, you just point your bureaucratic friends in the right direction so they can do it:
http://californiahomeschool.net/howTo/cps.htm
http://educate-yourself.org/cn/hhsCeausescustyle17aug13.shtml
Only after a trained professional believes there is evidence of abuse is the state/CPS contacted.
Trained professionals? Like the trained professionals that require you to monitor female patients for “signs” of abuse regardless of what the visit is for? The same professionals that have produced a criteria where only an adult male could “reasonably” be the culprit if there ARE “signs”? The same professionals that authorized this:
http://parkercountyblog.com/2013/08/16/obamacare-provision-forced-home-inspections/
You see, I too work in the health care industry. I read the same yearly and bi- yearly PC material you do and taken the same “tests”. These professionals are not trying to do what is right, but rather they are just covering their own rear ends or just making a buck. Either way I say good riddance.
See my earlier about hospitals closing if not following state/CMS guidelines. You obviously have no concept of how reliant healthcare facilities are on government payments. I’ve been informed that it’s about 2/3s of revenue
I’m quite aware of a hospitals reliance on taxpayer monies for payment and of how this increases year after year as the “Affordable” Care Act unfolds. I personally know several doctors who say they are getting out of medicine as their salaries are estimated to significantly decrease over the next decade.
I don’t care. None of it is an excuse to help the barbaric CPS do further harm to another family, let alone be proud that you did.
You left off the “Inconceivable.” from my comment for some reason. Was the sarcasm too subtle?
No, it was irrelevant.
At 2/3s revenue, healthcare facilities don’t have a choice either.
Yes you do. You don’t have to notify CPS.
Again, do I think there are some bad actors in CPS/government? Yes I do. Government workers are people, and some people are straight-up evil.
I’ve provided several links showing how corrupt CPS is. It is a destructive institution that thrives on tax payer money to disrupt and financially rape families. It has to continuously find new families to destroy for more revenues. We aren’t talking about a few bad apples.
Are you saying there is no such thing ass child abuse by a parent?
No, I’m saying it happens a lot LESS than it is reported to be happening. I’m saying find another solution. Most families have enough to deal with already. They don’t need the government taking away their children too.
Sorry I got upset about people defending whipping a child until he bleeds.
I’d have taken ten whippings until I bled to have my father back.
I’ll do better. I promise. Please don’t hit me again, Daddy.
Bradford is right, you are a woman. I wish you would hit yourself with that tire iron you threatened Cane with.
Your ignorance of how healthcare and the regulations it must work under in this country is astonishing for someone who wanted to put in their two cents. I don’t know what your personal experience has been, but you really don’t seem to see the bigger picture here.
In my ignorance I work with doctors, PAs, nurses, LPNs, and an assortment of techs in health care everyday (not to mention management). The bigger picture is thanks to feminist drones like yourself following PC scripts written by “professionals”, the state is assuming more and more direct control over the individual as men are debased and families are rendered non-existent. Thank you for doing your part.
I know what your saying, and you’re right: it can’t be programmed in as an all-pervasive attitude that colors everything, because no one recognizes it that way. But it can be programmed in as a practical matter in various specific cases. For instance, if an AI is assigned to evaluate resumes and select candidates for a job, all you need is a few lines of code:
if( $applicant->{sex} eq ‘female’ ){
$applicant->move_to_top_of_pile();
}
And bingo: everyone the AI invites in for an interview is a woman. They’ll program it in in as many overt ways as they can think of, but it’ll still fall short of the blanket coverage it has now.
@A Regular Guy
http://uncabob.blogspot.com.au/2015/02/leftism-is-based-on-hatred-of-father.html
“Who’s your daddy? Why any man who is living in the same house while banging your mom!”
Not so long ago, those guys were called “Uncles.”
@ infowarrior1
Interesting. I’ll have to check it out.
@ Spike
“Fatherhood has been defined by Progressives as just that: whoever is banging your mother. It gets worse: one opinion writer in Australia defined a family member as “Someone who you share toothpaste with”. That is, no sisters, no brothers, no fathers, just a tribe of (sub)humans living with the matriarch.”
The first word that came to mind when I read this was “goblins”.
@ GunnerQ
“Going even more basic, redefining words can be a religious statement. Homosexuals used to ask why Christians were so upset about homosexual marriage when it wasn’t hurting anybody. The answer was they were changing the definition of marriage from “man and wife” to “a pair of currently willing adults”, which is not what marriage is. They might as well force Christians to deny Christ as force Christians to accept as truth what is obviously a lie because the reason we worship Christ in the first place is because he’s the True God, not because.he’s the Useful God.”
How can we, assuming Christians, expect those who live in darkness to honor God’s established institution of marriage when the majority of what passes for Christians these days hold Christ’s commands regarding said institution with such contempt? I’m not justifying so-called “Gay Marriage” (there is no such thing), but the energy and resistance the American Christian Church put into stopping the homosexual agenda while displaying nothing but apathy towards divorce is the definition of hypocrisy.
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/04/30/britain-s-crazy-decision-to-ban-beach-body-ads.html
How important is physical attraction in relationships?
http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=958472
On marital sex and marriage to a non catholic
http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=958442
Is it ok to choose NOT to have children?
http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=958430
http://killtoparty.com/2015/04/08/simpsons-roasting-on-an-open-fire-1989-and-the-diminished-respect-for-fatherhood/
Cail, we just went back to broadcast TV since AT&T Uverse doesn’t work with my Tivos. Lots of channels there though and much of it is much more clean than the modern trash. I would love to find that channel. They may sneak a few movies in like you note, but I doubt they will take it too far from the war and western movies as that is a key part of their genre. Though many of those movies do glorify the power of the state, so they are not always wonderful even if no women are involved.
That said, I still like watching The Longest Day.
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Novaseeker’s story concerning the conference he attended (and TFH’s further comments) reminds me that in one of his better posts, Captain Capitalism – a moment of genius – observed that female dominated HR departments select candidates as if they are sorting for a boyfriend. Given that there is a four-to-one female bias against males (the peer-reviewed citation is Riach and Rich 2006) it is hardly surprising that once they have their supply of females, HR will be looking for men based on their sexual attractiveness and will treat all other men as somewhere between non-existent and a species of vermin.
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@Joshua
Yes, yesterday.
Actually, I quoted your notation that it was a family matter, and responded that we should butt out of family matters.
You’re being sensational here in an attempt to amp up the emotional outrage. Every father absolutely outclasses and overpowers every small child. Your amping up here only fuels the anti-father, anti-child, anti-discipline crowd. Poorly done.
A switch is for discipline. One of the ways we (and the child) can know that a beating is for discipline and not mere hate or anger is the presence of a dedicated tool. So stop being facetious. Again, your emotional amperage by use of the word “weapon” fuels the anti-father, anti-child, anti-discipline culture.
He texted the boys mother that he was sorry before anyone else even saw the boy. It had nothing to do with the arrest. At the time of the confession that he had hit his son too hard, he had no idea it would be a news story, or that the police would be involved.
You might like the my blog post I linked above: National Fools League.
Actually, you didn’t ask before. If he were my brother, I’d say to him, “Bro, you got to get a lighter touch with that switch. With a spanking it’s the pain that’s important; not the marks. Be strong, but keep your anger out of it. If you get angry–like I sometimes do and like they sometimes deserve–put him in the corner and wait until you’re calm. Then go get the switch, do some work, and then go about your day. Besides, bro, you’re a black man and lots of people would love to see you go to jail. Don’t give them the satisfaction.” That’s what I’d say.
I’d say it was sometime between 2007 – 2010 that Bob Geldof spoke about his time as band leader of the Boomtown Rats. I don’t recall exactly but as I remember he joked how he had priority of access to the Groupies and how his band mates had to settle for “Sloppy seconds”.
I’d hazard a guess there was more truth in that than not. And this interview, remember, was a long time after his ‘wife’ left him for another Rock star… both of whom basically self destructed in rather sordid fashion. Of course more recently Geldof’s daughter Peaches, who apparently revelled in Groupie-like excess, similarly perished.
It’s a simple truth that the sort of attitude that Geldof has regarding relations between the sexes does far more to destroy families and therefore communities, whether in Africa or America, than raising money for aid at a rock and roll party will ever do to build communities.
Dalrock, I don’t know if you are still reading comments on this post but I wanted to get you to take a look at this post and comments section. If anyone knows how to email Dalrock post below.
HR will be looking for men based on
Some of this will be guided by personal preferences, but a business that follows this too much will go out of business, so it is not sustainable for the long run. Tech people are very needed in all companies and tend to not be as attractive, so this strategy will kill any company.
That doesn’t mean the temptation isn’t there, but I suspect that many hiring managers will push past it.
Brad —
Oh it definitely varies by discipline, that’s very true. The “BP” types tend to populate HR (mostly women) and marketing. If you hang around those areas in my company, the ratio of pretty women and good looking guys shoots through the roof as compared to when you are standing in, say, IT or Finance or Tax or what have you. Mind you these aren’t sales-people — they are marketing people, so desk jockeys who focus on marketing without much of a retail interface, but they are still much better looking than in other areas.
Thanks Barnabas. I’ll check it out.
Regular Guy @ 10:36 pm:
“How can we, assuming Christians, expect those who live in darkness to honor God’s established institution of marriage when the majority of what passes for Christians these days hold Christ’s commands regarding said institution with such contempt?”
It doesn’t take a Christian to understand how equating fatherhood with Pimp of the Month will have seriously unpleasant consequences for society. I cannot think of any monotheist or polytheist religion that would accept the gov’t’s current definitions of fatherhood. That’s why I was talking about this being a statement of religion, not just ignorant bureaucrats making stuff up. They do not think truth exists at all.
No doubt they’re trying to debunk mathematics as we speak. Gotta balance the budget, you know.
“but the energy and resistance the American Christian Church put into stopping the homosexual agenda while displaying nothing but apathy towards divorce is the definition of hypocrisy.”
I agree and personally don’t think the Church did much more than make noise about the Sodomites’ goals anyway. That being said, my point was that we’re Christians because it’s correct, not because it’s our favorite flavor, so going along with obvious lies is basically apostasy.
Is this true? Has the Catholic Church gone full feminist?
http://qz.com/394523/the-pope-has-finally-declared-that-adam-was-wrong-to-blame-eve-for-his-sin/
Is this true? Has the Catholic Church gone full feminist?
http://qz.com/394523/the-pope-has-finally-declared-that-adam-was-wrong-to-blame-eve-for-his-sin/
It’s true he said those things. It reminds me of this video:
@ Barnabas
I don’t know why I’m still amazed at how out-of-touch elders in most congregations are regarding the modern state of men and women. The sermon referred to in the article is described as “a line in the sand” but it’s actually an offensive attack on male headship. “It’s a scandal!” they claim as if overly aggressive, tyrannical men are prolific in the church when all red pill men know that’s it’s precisely the opposite.
Lol, just laugh at them. They have no idea how men are starting to take the constant attacks on masculinity and headship. It’s already such a bad idea to get married that I love it when they continue to make it even worse. Let the truth be heard!
Oh, and guess who gets to decide if the husband’s headship is tyrannical? Oh yea, the wife…. and they still go on as if men have power and are the abusers. Men have no power in marriage, none. A man who marries is asking for his balls to be removed, by his wife, Church and legal system.
Stop support of marriage, it’s madness.
Dear Barnabas & Regular Guy:
Are you amused, as I am, by the sudden proclivity to restrict comments on articles like these? It seems like the trend has accelerated up in the past year.
The writers of this feminist garbage know they have zero popular support, and plan accordingly.
Boxer
http://www.catholicgentleman.net/2015/04/porn-destroyed-my-marriage-and-i-hate-it/ <– another example of female headship in action with porn use as the threatpoint to bully the father into shaping up with divorce following right after, notice the woman's paternalistic attitude to her husband "…I gave him six months to show me some real change…" and a implication he's only good for child support "I am financially ruined, and he doesn’t even pay his child support as ordered." FI in action, and as Dalrock said, the father does not matter to this woman.
@ Boxer
Yep, I noticed that too. They instinctively know, their nonsense doesn’t hold up to scrutiny. I have found that church leaders have a very soft underbelly that they guard jealously like a cat. I suppose it’s natural after spending much of your time, as a pastor, issuing one-way sermons and getting praised for it all the time by their congregation. I imagine legitimate public criticism coming from another Christian feels like as a slap in the face.
Normally, the way to handle such an issue is to pull the brother aside and respectfully address it, but if you’re a pastor and you post this garbage on the internet, Christians have an obligation to confront the heresy publicly.
Who exactly is Justin Meyer getting at? Is it true that Dalrock and his merry band of women-haters are covertly encouraging wife-bashing? Meyer, however, is a true Christian, and to prove it, he has, apart from writing a lot of books, acquired, just as the celebrities do, no less than two Trophy Children – surely a somewhat broad interpretation of Exodus 20:2
There are lots and lots of Christian men who are ready to answer the call of Meyer’s dogwhistle. Of course women do; being easily deceived and all that.
Above someone called his post “heresy”, but it’s very hard to spot, or convict. Meyer and others like him carefully craft their messages to avoid specific language that could be construed as heresy. In this case, Meyer made up the word “hyper-headship”, and then claims that Christ/the Bible are against it. Since “hyper-headship” doesn’t exist it cannot be spoken against.
The dogwhistle part is that headship does exist, and if they can’t be against hyper-headship (because what does not exist cannot be found), then they can be against the next best thing: practiced headship.
Reading the comments on that FB post it’s pretty clear that any exercised male leadership that isn’t essentially servitude to the wife is going to be considered abusive, and even if a guy actually *believes* in headship, this is taken to be a sign that the guy has abusive tendencies. Essentially this is trying to overturn headship without coming right out and saying so.
Other posts on that FB page are similar, including ones openly sympathetic to egalitarian feminism.
I think it’s pretty clear where that guy and the ministry are coming from on a number of issues from a brief perusal of that FB page and the various posts on it.
Its called servant leadership. SERVANT leadership!!!
Jason Meyer said, “In other words, hyper-headship becomes a breeding ground for domestic abuse,” but does he or others like him address the other side of that issue, which is that people are content enough to refer to and focus on (possibly) bad examples of headship that they create a breeding ground for rebellion against scriptural truth?
Re: The Facebook post, Novaseeker is right, as usual.
I get so frustrated with people who say I am hysterical when I tell them a man who gives a firm directive to his wife in front of acquaintences at a house party is at risk for being investigated by the powers that be for abuse.
The scenario is not paranoia. It is entirely conceivable that friends could be at your house, and witness the headship dynamic in a biblical marriage and go home and (probably the wife) call the police.
My source, for those who are new around here: I was a domestic violence batterers intervention group facilitator in Californias state-mandated system. I have over 3500 clinical contact hours in the business. (And it is a business).
Scott —
Would it be accurate to say that practiced Christian headship fails the Duluth indicators of abuse? I’m roughly familiar with them but not as familiar as you are.
Identity politics is taking off like wildfire in the Church and para-church organizations and there is no mainstream Christian figure willing to speak out against it. There are some very smart men associated with The Gospel Coalition but not a word as the blog posts piece after piece of radical feminism and black Marxism.
Novaseeker-
Short answer: Yes.
Longer one? The Duluth Model (which is more or less codified into many a state law now) has a basic presupposition that “male privilege” is abuse. Male privilege is defined as any assertion of authority because you are male. Therefore for example, putting your foot down, (asserting the final decision making authority based on maleness) is abuse.
This is not hyperbole or paraoia. It is to the point know where it is enforceable by law. I was a key player in doing so for 3 years.
Scott – might you have any idea where Meyer cribbed this abuse chart from?
http://www.hopeingod.org/sermon/fooled-false-leadership
Sure, note here in the pie “slice” just below the 9 o’clock position:
https://psychexpress.wordpress.com/2011/11/01/abuse-its-all-about-power-and-control/
This is the handout I gave to about 700+ men reminding them they are not the king of their castle.
Hyper-headship = leading your wife in a direction she’d rather not go.
Seems like a strawman argument by Meyer in the article “Fooled by False Leadership”: “I have heard this statement before—warning, if you want to see me get visibly upset, just say what I am about to say in my presence: “If wives would just submit better and become more meek and quiet, then husbands would not get so angry.” These thoughts must be taken captive, or else we can create a climate in which domestic abuse can take root and grow.
I find it hard to believe anyone in Jason Meyer’s circle of peers would say such a thing. I’m more likely to believe he heard something like it and embellished because of an emotional reaction to what was being said.
And the whole “Hyper Calvinism” and “Hyper Headship” are misleading labels. Either something is Calvinist or it is not. Either something some is based on Christian Headship or it is not.
BTW, check out what is classified by a “biblical counselor” John Henderson as “Less Severe” Mental Abuse in the article:
Regular, harsh criticism; Constant questioning and challenging thoughts and perspective; Cold shoulders or silent treatment to punish; Frequent “innocent” sarcasm about the ideas of the other person; Instinctive defensiveness; Habitual dishonesty to avoid accountability and blame others; Using Scripture to correct and control spouse to selfish ends.
You happily married, red-pill guys in these forums have a bullseye painted on your back and this mangina is itching to pull the trigger.
You know, men in his church really only have to worry about one woman. He has to worry about hundreds. Maybe someone uses his own charts against him one day.
@ Scott
…or how about out @ the 1:30 to 3:00 position “Making her feel guilty”. Wow, a criteria so broad you can drive a truck through.
This is bad.
Every time I read another Lift chasing sermon like that I try to think of an analog to substitute for abusive husbands that would get the reaction that this sermon actually deserves. For illustrative purposes.
What behavior could one parody, something that is archaic, something universally accepted as a bad thing, and something which could be alleged rooted in a poor understanding of scripture and is presently rampant among churchgoers?
The problem is to make it really work it would have to be something snipped and twisted from scripture, it would need to be something that was maybe a big issue during, say, the enlightenment and for which derision would be rightly forthcoming for the person making the allegation of its ever increasing threat the Christiandom.
Kind of a shame that the comments petered out over on facebook
In the “less severe physical abuse” column of the “all your marriages are belong to us” sermon, we see…flicking.
If you are being flicked, the bulletin gives information on next steps. Please let us help. God hates flicking, and so do we. We are committed to help. If you have come to us for help before and have been disappointed, please give us another chance. We believe that the tide of awareness has risen on all three campuses and that positive changes are happening.
I find it hard to believe anyone in Jason Meyer’s circle of peers would say such a thing. I’m more likely to believe he heard something like it and embellished because of an emotional reaction to what was being said.
He has never heard that. Period. He is parroting something he has heard that someone heard that someone’s neighbors renter in the garage apartment said…..no really…..because he knows the sister in law of the guy that put a new roof on that garage…..its real I tell ya.
What he really is doing is providing what passes as source text for the myriad angry evangelical feminists that run the gamut from highly literate but lacking in discernment to low intelligence rebellious women we see planting blogs and comments all over the net saying that they just know there are more and more churches teaching men to abuse.
In over ten years of seeking it, in seeking a man or woman who could point me to it, Ive yet to find a single church referenced or pastor or program that is part of this, now gotta be coast to coast and in every city cabal of he man woman beaters club Christian churches.
If you rub dirt on your face, blacken some teeth, drag one leg and carry a sign and also crying out its slogan “bring out yer dead” long enough…..someone is gonna sit something outside.
Un flicking believable
Charles Murray shows that working class people are dropping out of the church and this is one reason why. If you a high IQ, low impulsivity couple then this probably won’t affect you much. If you are a low IQ, low status, highly impulsive blue collar male married to a similar female then it would be hopeless to try marriage in a church like this.
On the “Hyper-headship” sermon, several things come to mind:
1) He is using Scripture which warns against pastors who would teach false doctrine and puff themselves up, and re-purposing it to attack headship. There is more than a little irony here. Here he is nullifying biblical teaching while puffing himself up by putting down the rest of the husbands in the congregation.
2) He proves his anti-feminist bona fides by going off topic and talking about how men shouldn’t hold purses because it makes them look unmanly, unless their wife asks them to hold it in which case they are duty bound as a Christian husband to do so as an act of self sacrifice.
3) Early on in the sermon he explains that a wife nagging is a sign that her husband isn’t leading her: “He makes the wife do most of the initiating work and puts her in the vulnerable position of appearing like a nag because she always has to ask to get anything done that needs to get done.” But other husbands lead too much and hurt their wives feelings: “He dictates so much that the wife doesn’t feel like a spiritual equal.” There is no winning here, and this is the part the wives are going to remember the most.
4) Abuse is very carefully undefined, because the whole point is to dismantle headship. All talk of abuse is just a battering ram to accuse any husband who tries to lead of being abusive.
5) He offers John Piper as the authoratative teacher on the topic of headship/submission. Piper you may recall lead the group that created the “Danvers Statement”, which is in reaction to (among other things) “6. the upsurge of physical and emotional abuse in the family;”. It also warns wives against the (feminist invented) sin of “servility”. The Danvers Statement is the founding document for the CBMW, a group which is at best vocally ambivalent about headship and submission. Piper was also a close mentor of Pastor Driscoll, and Driscoll promoted Piper’s books on the topic.
6) His cheap shot at Doug Phillips, offering Vision Forum as the poster child for abusive, hyper headship. Phillips clearly failed, and has repented for it. But Phillips sin wasn’t of abuse, it was one of sexual infidelity. Phillips was also very careful not to hold women accountable.
7) He says the church needs to constantly be on guard to make sure women’s voices are heard because men have “blind spots”. This is essentially the opposite of what Paul tells us in 1 Tim 2:11-15.
I stopped reading there, but I’m sure there is plenty more. The thing is there will be a great deal just like this. There is a large group of modern Christians who want to be able to claim they are following headship and submission, but in order to make it palatable they go to these herculean lengths to redefine headship into something that doesn’t offend our modern feminist sensibilities. This is why the actual verses on headship and submission are either avoided (and some other Scripture is re-purposed and put in its place), or the entire focus of teaching the relevant Scripture is to explain why for all practical purposes it no longer applies (or never did).
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Number 1) would be an over arching point I would make if I dissected the sermon. There were one or two other instances of painful irony like this from the tables of escalating abuse:
Regular, harsh criticism; Constant questioning and challenging thoughts and perspective;
Like he and his lift chasing ilk dish on men ?
Then there is the false dichotomy:”Paul is their servant, not their lord.”
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@Empath,
“In over ten years of seeking it, in seeking a man or woman who could point me to it, Ive yet to find a single church referenced or pastor or program that is part of this, now gotta be coast to coast and in every city cabal of he man woman beaters club Christian churches.”
I have also looked for churches and Youtube sermons that teach strong husband leadership and I can not find them. I bought Michael Pearl’s book on Marriage for husbands thinking it might emphasize firm leadership but so far it is standard blue pill stuff – half way through the book.
Most Domestic Violence occurs in households where unmarried to each other partners cohabit. The more conscientious DV researchers call abuse in these situations, Inter Partner Violence (IPV).
Dalrock,
“6) His cheap shot at Doug Phillips, offering Vision Forum as the poster child for abusive, hyper headship.”
Just before Vision Forum imploded, Phillips’ church had a membership roll of only 60 families. Typical Sunday morning attendance is half the membership list. Therefore, we are talking about a church with Sunday morning attendance of 60 adults and a bunch of children.
@Empath
My read was this is a preemptive strike on 1 Pet 3. Don’t you dare tell her to submit if her husband isn’t a servant leader!
@ Scott
That is some scary crap.
https://psychexpress.wordpress.com/2011/11/01/abuse-its-all-about-power-and-control/
For example, one sign of abuse is “saying the abuse didn’t happen”. So, if a woman accuses a man of abuse, and he defends himself against the accusation, that proves he’s a abuser. So, a man’s options are…
a. Admit to the abuse, which proves he’s an abuser, or…
b. Defend himself from the abuse, which proves he’s an abuser.
But get this…
“smashing things”, “destroying her property”
Didn’t Family Life Today feature an episode in which the wife smashed the couple’s fine china to get the husband’s attention? Isn’t that abuse, then?
“threatening to leave her”, “threatening to take the children away”,
Aren’t those pretty standard pieces of advice (to women) from both Family Life Today and Focus on the Family? Doesn’t that make them abuse advocates?
Of course, we all know the answer. Only a man can abuse a woman. The inverse is impossible. And abuse is whatever the woman says it is.
to the choir, preach I will….
We’ve all noted every absurdity in the derivation of the term servant leader. Somehow, though, this quote struck a different chord with me.
They best be careful. They’ve gone and hoisted themselves with their own bloody petard. He used his authority to serve them. That is actually not a bad phraseology. If one is capable of gleaning meaning from collections of words strung together and not reading as if through glasses made of carnival mirror glass.
as much as I like to lambast the word-servant-and lament the de-emphasis of the word -leader-, here in the form, “to serve them”, I’m good with that.
Washing in the Word is serving. Similarly the medical caregiver, the nurse for example, is to serve the patient. To do those things the patient cannot do for self. To provide palliative and curative things, to minimize or withhold destructive things. To prescribe life and lifestyle changes geared to bringing well being short and long term. To help rehabilitate the person and help the person rehabilitate himself/herself.
The caregiver does so by the authority of training and licensure. They can prevent the emphysema patient smoking while in hospital…the diabetic gorging on petit fours.
That stuff sounds like abuse to me. After all the Christian husband who dare rebuke his wife’s petulant attitude, her passive aggressive soft attacks, her refusal of affections, her selfish inability to prioritize time for the benefit of the functionality of the group called family, who must rely on each other for things…..instead they would suggest that there is no authority from which he serves because he is at her whim and fancy. he is to throw his jacket in the puddles she decides to walk through so as to avoid water damage to her shoes.
Jason Meyers imPreached himself in his ramblings
What the hell is “flicking?” Wasn’t she a character in that movie Election?
Scroll the flick up, its in a Sarahs daughter where she picks up “flicking” as a new form of abuse listed in one of the tables on the sermon notes
@Scott
Avoid parties at your home with worldly people who will throw you under the DV bus.
Those kind of people are suitable for evangelistic outreach, but not worthy of being out in a position to observe your private life and then go and try to destroy it.
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According to the New York Times, this is what Black moms know:
http://mobile.nytimes.com/2015/05/03/opinion/sunday/what-black-moms-know.html?referrer=
Ah, OK, I see the ‘chart.’ “Hostile facial expressions” as a form of abuse is my favorite, though.
@PokeSalad:
I know many a 2 year-old that should be doing hard time!
Gunner Q, Regular Guy,
“I’m not justifying so-called “Gay Marriage” (there is no such thing), but the energy and resistance the American Christian Church put into stopping the homosexual agenda while displaying nothing but apathy towards divorce is the definition of hypocrisy.”
Westboro Baptist speaks out strongly against divorce:
http://www.cmt.com/news/1713766/vince-gill-confronts-westboro-baptist-church-protesters/
Most evangelical churches did not begin to get politically active until 1980. Earlier, because of a reaction against “Social Gospel” churches they avoided political activism. By 1980 the ship had already sailed on No Fault Divorce and homosexual “rights” was the new, immediate fight.
For my the Catholic teaching on marriage runs up to the Pius XI’s “Casti Connubi”. (Not even the sentimentalist “woman’s-genius” JP2 in his Wednesday Audiences). I want to pray that the Magisterium is some day purified from the feminist and chivalrous-gynocentric heresies. They cannot be materially valid, but we need to pray for the Church members, to recognize the heresy, reject it, and for the proper institutions (Holy Office, which I pray will come back), to anathema it. We have coped, by the Grace of God, with Arianism and Nestorianism, and by His Grace we hope to overcome Feminism, Modernism and Bergoglianism.
Considering as Vince Gill and Amy Grant are flagrant adulterers–this fact is well accepted–Westboro is more closely aligned with Christian doctrine than whatever churchian mess Amy Grant or Vince Gill attend (Dunwoody Baptist, I think, which has fully embraced their adulteries).
One of the sad realities of the modern day is that many cults and sects are closer to Christian faith in terms of how their members live their day to day lives than Christian orthodoxy is anymore.
@ JN: “One of the sad realities of the modern day is that many cults and sects are closer to Christian faith in terms of how their members live their day to day lives than Christian orthodoxy is anymore.”
Precisely, which explains their appeal to some.
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Ah, OK, I see the ‘chart.’ “Hostile facial expressions” as a form of abuse is my favorite, though.
From now on, we all better start walking around with a grin.
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