Huffington Post had an article last week about Amy Schumer’s 6 month wedding anniversary: Amy Schumer Celebrates Marriage Milestone With A Fart Joke, Of Course
“Married 6 months today,” she wrote on Instagram Monday. “I love you more every day. sorry my fart woke us up this morning.”
Farts are an odd obsession with ugly feminists*, so at first whiff you might think this is business as usual for Amy Schumer. However, it seems that in this case it might be a sign of alpha widowhood. The Huffington Post article closes with a strikingly similar quote from Schumer, but regarding a different man and with the roles reversed:
Prior to marrying Fischer, Schumer dated furniture designer Ben Hanisch for nearly two years.
“We went out with a couple who had been together a long time, we were trying to rush the intimacy,” she said at a charity show in New York in June. “Like I was trying to impress the girl and I was like, ‘Well, he woke me up this morning with a fart!’ And he just slowly turned to me and he goes, ‘Are we doing this?’”
In the E News story on Schumer’s wedding, much of the article focused on Hanisch, the one that got away:
Her reluctance to share more excitement about finding love again prior to saying “I do” was a lingering effect from her breakup with Ben Hanisch less than a year ago…
[In July of 2016] she admitted to having a little more anxiety about the whole thing. “Being in love [with Hanisch] is the scariest thing in the world,” she said. “You want to f–king cry and scream. I can’t handle it. Every time we say good-bye, I think, ‘This will have been a nice last week together.’ Or I tell myself nothing is real and he’s going to leave me and tell me he never loved me. I feel so bad for him. How exhausting it must be dating me.”
*See Also:
- Friday afternoon ugly feminists: Hot farts edition.
- She’s saving her farts for you.
- The ugly feminist secret weapon.
Pingback: Sounds like she squeaked one past him. | @the_arv
Anal-based humor is also a jewish schtick. Combine the two, and you have the perfect storm of disgust.
You can just feel that newlywed excitement oozing from her face in that picture…
Some idiot married that?! WTF!
Well Amy is 36 now, so a wedding HAD to happen.
Her wedding vows are what you would expect from her:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-5438995/Amy-Schumer-reveals-adult-wedding-vows.html
I understand that Schumer has had to deny that she is not racist (as you do) so I googled photos of her last three pre-husband boyfriends: all white, young and masculine. Alpha widow.
Women aren’t funny nor do they need to be. A rather famous and fat English comedienne used to work the bar in my then local. I don’t remember her; her jokes are at about the same level of bodily function as Schumer’s.
Better than Game; make girls laugh. That is, I think, where Jason needs to up his game.
and unsurprisingly she’s suddenly into motherhood, with a hurry!
https://www.etonline.com/amy-schumer-talks-sleeping-with-her-husband-on-first-date-sex-vows-having-kids-100050
“We had sex. You know me. Sex!” Schumer told the radio star while discussing her first date with the chef. “There was no nonsense. It was just, ‘Let’s go.’ And, it was sweet. It was really nice. We had a great night.”
Schumer noted there are advantages to tying the knot after just months of dating.
As for what’s next, motherhood could be on the agenda.
“Maybe,” Schumer told Stern. “I got a little dog and I really love her, so that’s the first step!”
Nothing like vowing sodomy to keep a marriage going.
Then again unless this guy has no IQ, lived in a cave and just came out a few months ago, or is a closet homo…it’s not like her character hasn’t been on full display.
Echo4November — “Anal-based humor is also a jewish schtick”
I should have known it was the Joos who corrupted the world with scatological humor. This Dalrock dood is probly one of (((them))) too. No wonder he goes anonymous.
Thanks for the reality check.
earl says:
August 22, 2018 at 4:25 pm
Nothing like vowing sodomy to keep a marriage going.
Then again unless this guy has no IQ, lived in a cave and just came out a few months ago, or is a closet homo…it’s not like her character hasn’t been on full display.
Marriage for women like that in Hollywood is a power move. Kinda like Bill marrying Hillary, well, he married her to give her some status. She could not be a ‘failure’. She had to have it all. So, they found her a candidate for the role.
Sex with her Beta guy was “sweet” and “nice.” Do you think she would say her sex with the bad boys was sweet and nice? Nope.
Ray6777 says:
August 22, 2018 at 5:26 pm
Sex with her Beta guy was “sweet” and “nice.”
What she means Ray, is that she was thinking about her groceries list.
On the other side of the coin, Healthline has decided to transition from the term “vagina” to the term “front hole” in certain medical advisories. The SJW’s are always trying to push their agenda through one door or another.
https://www.pluralist.com/posts/1870-medical-site-adopts-the-term-front-hole-to-replace-vagina-in-the-name-of-gender-inclusivity
I’ve attended a few secular weddings lately. When It came time to “vows”, none were actually made. Instead, fluffy sentimental sweet nothings are exchanged. Never a promise of fidelity or permanence. Never. Instead, nonsense like “you complete me”, “you make me whole”, “you’re my partner in crime (WTF?)”, etc.
It’s almost like they expect their marriages to fail.
‘It’s almost like they expect their marriages to fail.’
Well if there isn’t anything about fidelity or permanence…rest assured it likely will.
Dalrock, I come back from the articles hunting trip, and came back to you with this gem!
https://pjmedia.com/trending/prof-claims-responsible-fatherhood-reinforces-patriarchy/
Frank K
I’ve attended a few secular weddings lately. When It came time to “vows”, none were actually made. Instead, fluffy sentimental sweet nothings are exchanged. Never a promise of fidelity or permanence. Never. Instead, nonsense like “you complete me”, “you make me whole”, “you’re my partner in crime (WTF?)”, etc.
Sorta like this ?
Pingback: Sounds like she squeaked one past him. | Reaction Times
Way back then, “Serial” was a comedy that poked fun at loopy liberal Californians. Fast forward to the present and it’s a documentary.
”I feel so bad for him. How exhausting it must be dating me”.
Well, Amy: Whose fault is that?
Another obsession ugly feminists have is to treat their husbands and lovers like trash, because…vagina offered….
Their refrain, ”If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best”! doesn’t ring true, because 1) They aren’t Marilyn Monroe and 2) They’re well past ”their best” when they decide to marry. Even then, doing their best would be some sort of imposition by the man involved, and we know we can’t impose anything on them. That would be oppressive patriarchy….
Caveat Emptor for beta-boys intending to marry feminist women: ”the best” never comes. All you get is ”the worst”.
From Chad…to Brad. This is what happens when guys fuck down, they destroy marital stability for all betas fighting for the scraps and perversely, inherit all the risk. The second guy could still do better in his own right as well. Don’t know what the hell is wrong with these guys.
Sex Every Day Guy
Fart Beta
All within one year.
I believe they are referred to whoremongers in the bible. Just as bad as the sluts.
All this, and gassy wake-up-calls too?
Amy Schumer is disgusting, but more importantly, she’s simply not funny.
NSFW:
http://www.cc.com/video-clips/mu481q/inside-amy-schumer-milk-milk-lemonade
Who on earth would be impressed by this? It’s neither shocking nor edgy — just a size 18 bore (like the dress she squeezed her fat butt into.)
However, it seems that in this case it might be a sign of alpha widowhood
How “alpha” can any man really be who would even give the time of day to a disgusting sow like Amy Schumer?
Amy Schumer is disgusting, but more importantly, she’s simply not funny.
…
Who on earth would be impressed by this? It’s neither shocking nor edgy — just a size 18 bore (like the dress she squeezed her fat butt into.)
It’s the kind of infantile bullshit that we laughed at when we were in fifth grade and didn’t know any better. That enough (so-called) adults find this funny that a talentless cow like Schumer can make a profitable living at it has horrifying implications.
Sassy AND Gassy?? Cuckservatives would consider her a catch!
When I was stateside I noticed that what we more tactfully refer to as wind you refer to as gas – yet you also use the term for what we call petrol (for motor-cars). Never understood that.
Chris Fischer is an award winning chef based in Malibu, California.
Does anyone else get a little worried when such a man who can cook like whoa agrees to marry an already overweight woman, post-wall, age 36, with baby-rabies, and who displays every indication she is about to “quit the world” (no make up, DILIGAF grungy clothing, no smile)?
Notice her closed, pursed lips on that PDA kiss photo.
This is a man she needs, but he is simply not the man she genuinely wants.
In her mind, she probably feels she settled hard.
‘Sassy AND Gassy?? Cuckservatives would consider her a catch!’
Hopefully her husband woos her everyday (in between farts).
‘Sassy AND Gassy?? Cuckservatives would consider her a catch!’
Hopefully her husband woos her everyday (in between farts).
Lol. But there is a cure for that
Chris Fischer is an award winning chef based in Malibu, California.
…
Notice her closed, pursed lips on that PDA kiss photo.
This is a man she needs, but he is simply not the man she genuinely wants.
Like all modern, entitled fatty-fuglies, Amy will never accept the reality that the man of her dreams has options, the least appealing and attractiv of whom are miles above her in SMV. That’s undoubtedly why her relationship with “alpha” Ben Hanisch ended. She was his one-time romp into fatty-fugly territory just to scratch a passing itch. There was NO WAY he was ever going to wife that thing up when much prettier and better was his for the taking. Even a man of Chris Fischer’s status can obviously do MUCH better than this nasty, puerile, pyschotic future star of My 600-Pound Life.
But then again, this is California, the Millennial Generation, and its psycho-sexually gelded men we’re talking about here.
I’m probably revealing something sad about myself, asking this question, but: Those two men, they’re way beyond her in looks and achievements, and almost certainly personality. How did she land either one of them? She must be far more attractive in person than on camera. How else do you explain it?
Turns out she’s a rapist too:
http://honeybadgerbrigade.com/2016/10/19/fuck-you-amyschumer/
“Those two men, they’re way beyond her in looks and achievements, and almost certainly personality. How did she land either one of them? She must be far more attractive in person than on camera. How else do you explain it?”
She is also a leftist media darling. The men can get a status and money boost for themselves while the attraction gap is enough to maybe stop extreme harpy behavior. A girl with more money is also a lower divorce financial rape risk for a wealthy guy.
There aren’t average men, they are Hollywood men born and raised in the cesspool.
I’d say that Amy Schumer is likely to pull the pin on the ‘fat’ grenade, but it looks as if it’s already gone off.
I’ve never found her funny. She’s simply crass – and her whole act is the lowest type of comedy. So she attracts the type of audience that are mental midgets. Kind of an ‘Andrew Dice Clay’ for fat-assed, blue-haired feminists.
‘Sassy and gassy’ – that’s comedic gold, and the author thereof best get it copyrighted ASAP; as Schumer has been accused of stealing jokes from other comedians.
That picture of her in the red pull-over and straw hat – I thought for sure that was a dude at first glance.
I predict a divorce in 5 years, as soon as her one token child is out of diapers.
I doubt she squeaked. She earthquaked one by him.
I remember reading an interview with actress Lena Headey (Cersei on Game of Thrones). She’s a Single Mom (having divorced her first husband).
Headey was discussing how great it is to be a Single Mom. She says her son (then about 3 or 4) likes to sleep in bed with her. One morning her son said, “Mommy, I farted last night. Did you smell it?”
Headey thought it was a cute story. I thought … Son has no dad. Raised by a strong, single mom who’s vocally very pro-LGBT. Even sleeps in bed with his mom. Yup, he’ll turn gay.
‘How else do you explain it?’
It’s a sham marriage? Rumor has it those folks in Hollyweird marry but it isn’t that much of a marriage if you get my drift.
All that’s left is the older man she allows to sexually abuse him.
I assumed Amy was gay. She fat and ugly enough to be a lesbian.
Her hubby is tall, lean, and not hideous. He could do better. However, Amy does have money, and big connections in both Hollywood and Washington politics. I’m guessing her hubby is either a gay gold digger, or a hetero gold digger.
But either way, hubby is a gold digger. No way is it love. Not only is Amy physically hideous, but she has a vulgar, nasty, and belligerent personality to match.
Red Pill Latecomer @ 11:27 am:
“Her hubby is tall, lean, and not hideous. He could do better. However, Amy does have money, and big connections in both Hollywood and Washington politics. I’m guessing her hubby is either a gay gold digger, or a hetero gold digger.”
That would be the ultimate rom-com. Foul-mouthed fatty marries a nice guy hoping to ruin his life only to discover he’s gay and cleaning out her life savings. ‘That was my plan!’ she cries at the climax, before making up over the revelation that he’s the current lover to her former Alpha Chad. The show ends with God apologizing to Sodom.
“Her hubby is tall, lean, and not hideous. He could do better. However, Amy does have money, and big connections in both Hollywood and Washington politics. I’m guessing her hubby is either a gay gold digger, or a hetero gold digger.”
I forgot men could be gold diggers.
She is the most disgusting person. Ugly inside and out. But rich. The thing some men will do for fame.
She is the most disgusting person. Ugly inside and out. But rich. The thing some men will do for fame.
Tom Arnold comes to mind. He was a D-list actor when he married Roseanne Barr at the height of her fame. Arnold was a gold-digging gigolo, but he earned every penny.
What attracts men to Amy Schumer?
That is like asking me why do serial killers do the odd things they do. I would entirely be speculating, because I just don’t ever think like that. I have no idea why a man would be attracted to her. Like the others I’d just have to speculate about it maybe being fame, or money, or mental derangement on their part. There have to be younger hotter women in Hollywood wanting to latch onto these men. It is really mind boggling to me that they would fall for Amy. What am I not aware of?
Poor Fischer. How did she snooker him into marrying her? He is in for a lifetime of pain and suffering. But since he’s Jewish he might enjoy that.
Earl said:
“Well if there isn’t anything about fidelity or permanence…rest assured it likely will.”
50% fail even with the language about “fidelity” because… open hypergamy.
@ray6777
”Sex with her Beta guy was “sweet” and “nice.” Do you think she would say her sex with the bad boys was sweet and nice? Nope.”
No its rough and animalistic as they like it to be.
Also more biblical than the sweet and nice relationship than with the beta:
https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2016/12/21/like-a-rutting-buck/
Red Pill Latecomer says:
August 23, 2018 at 6:20 pm
“The thing some men will do for fame.
Tom Arnold comes to mind. He was a D-list actor when he married Roseanne Barr at the height of her fame. Arnold was a gold-digging gigolo, but he earned every penny.”
Interesting trivia about Tom I read somewhere… Supposedly, when they were inevitably divorcing, he wanted to go the classy route, and to handle the divorce quietly. Not so Roseanne The Fishwife. She went majorly public about the whole thing, insulting him gravely. He let it go at first, but drew a line when she began to publicly insult him sexually. His retort was, “Even a [Boeing] 747 seems small inside The Grand Canyon”. I think she dropped the public frothing about their divorce after that.