With Pastor Abedini’s relaese, Heavy.com chose him as a topic for one of their 5 Fast Facts posts. Fast fact number three is:
3. His Wife Naghmeh Campaigned Relentlessly for His Release, But Then Quit After Saying He Had Abused Her
Unlike the Christian media, the Heavy.com author noted how strange this accusation really is (emphasis mine):
She said the abuse started early in their relationship and somehow worsened while he was in prison, when they communicated by phone and Skype.
Just before relaying the accusation that Saeed somehow abused his wife via phone and skype, the piece noted that the couple’s daughter had gone so long without hearing her father’s voice she was forgetting what he sounds like:
My daughter said she is forgetting Daddy’s voice and she asked me, ‘Do you think he has a beard now?’ I didn’t even think of that. She keeps playing the home videos over and over.
There are currently only two comments on the Heavy.com piece, the first is:
I hear he is a real bastard.
The second comment is a reply to the first one. It is not a reminder that all we have are bizarre whispers of accusations against a man incapable of defending himself, but a reminder that we are all sinners.
The Heavy.com article’s note of the strange accusations against Saeed contrasts with the Washington Post,* which received the modern Christian angle from Russell Moore of the Southern Baptist Convention. Moore’s statement presumes the bizarre whispered accusations are true:
Details of her abuse will eventually have to be addressed within the evangelical community, where she has been a prominent spokesperson for international religious freedom, said Russell Moore, president of the Southern Baptist Convention’s Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission.
“I dont think today is the day to address that,” he said. “I was stunned and surprised by Naghmeh’s statement. I did not know any of that. It was and is very troubling.”
*H/T Dave
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He obviously abused her by living. If he had died as a martyr, she would have been set!
Bastard!
Well, another “churchian” feminist reveals herself. I don’t reckon that any long term readers are surprised. I just don’t think that hypergamy is Christ like. Now, Eve, on the other hand……
I left a very mild real-talk response to the article. Let’s see if it stays up. 🙂
It is interesting that the un-churched (or however you want to describe it) sometimes see things more clearly. It speaks to the level of brainwashing and evil in the church.
Southern Baptist Convention’s Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission
“Ethics” and “Religious Liberty” in the same sentence as “Southern Baptist?” Seriously?
Details of her abuse will eventually have to be addressed within the evangelical community, where she has been a prominent spokesperson for international religious freedom
Apparently the word “alleged,” missing as what should have been the fourth word of the above quoted statement, is either too difficult to pronounce or write, or is available in only limited quantities and thus not available to Mr. Moore. That, or he is a product of a mainstream university’s “school of journalism,” in which aspiring wannabe scribes for the Establishment and the status quo are beaten upside the head and subsequently flogged whenever they dare insert that word into their work.
Sad story. I wasn’t aware of Pastor Abedini until reading your blog posts, but he seems to be a brave and inspirational individual from the Heavy.com article. Pity his wife chose to accuse him publicly when he was not in a position to defend himself. Even bigger pity that so much of the Christian community regards the mere making of an allegation as sufficient proof that the thing alleged happened. I hope that God gives strength to this Pastor and that justice and truth prevail.
I do wonder if the Pastor’s wife was threatened/blackmailed by Iranian intelligence to make these allegations, as they will neatly discredit the Pastor and cause dissension in the underground Iranian churches which he has contact with.
I heard Nag-meh say on the radio after the release words to the effect that we’ll have to wait and see, she’s changed in his absence, etc. She appears to have a foot out the door. His release is inconvenient to her, apparently.
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He’s going to want to go back to Iran after what is about to happen to him.
The endgame here will be fascinating to watch.
Unable to be the victim ‘widow’… she’ll now play victim to ‘judgemental people’ I imagine.
FYI – She did not send an email saying he was abusing her, she sent a private prayer request to a private prayer group and was betrayed by someone in this group and a prominent Christian magazine making it public and therefore had to explain. She never intended any of it to be public. This is why she cut off communication. She started a 21 day prayer and fast on Jan 5th 2016 for her husband. You are slandering someone without the facts. What was done to her by her PRIVATE PRAYER GROUP is incomprehensible and is a prime example of the state of the church in America.
Luke 18: 6 And the Lord said, Hear what the unjust judge says.
7 And will not God avenge his own elect, which cry day and night unto him, though he bear long with them?
8 I tell you that he will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless when the Son of man comes, shall He find faith on the earth?
9 And He spoke this parable unto those which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others:
PokeSalad, yup.
FYI – She did not send an email saying he was abusing her, she sent a private prayer request to a private prayer group and was betrayed by someone in this group and a prominent Christian magazine making it public and therefore had to explain. She never intended any of it to be public. This is why she cut off communication. She started a 21 day prayer and fast on Jan 5th 2016 for her husband. You are slandering someone without the facts. What was done to her by her PRIVATE PRAYER GROUP is incomprehensible and is a prime example of the state of the church in America.
She has “explained” nothing. She apparently stands by her accusations of abuse, regardless of the method by which they became widely known. If that is truly how the accusations were made known it is reprehensible, but it does not change her very serious charges. You seem to imply that you know more “facts” than you are letting on, so please enlighten.
Unlike many here I have little sympathy for Pastor Saeed who I see as the author of his own misfortune and deliberately so, for he knowingly broke the law and in an avowedly Muslim State. That seems to me to be very different from the American wanna-be Pastor who began to preach on a London street-corner and was arrested as a result of being reported to the Police by two passing feminists who objected to his using as his Biblical text, verses which they saw as Homophobic. Briton is at least a nominally Christian country; Iran Isn’t. Having said that, Naghmeh with her 13,000 Twitter and 76,000 Facebook supporters has gone from obscurity to public-figure and clearly she revels in her fame and concomitant attention. Her Twitter and Facebook Profile and Cover photos are notable for the absence therefrom of her husband’s image – effectively, airbrushed out – even at this time of joy. Despite her gushing thanks to the POTUS – who phoned yesterday, and himself presumably milking the occasion – Saeed’s freedom looks less like joy and more like trouble for Naghmeh who now has the difficult task of Janus-like showing gratitude whilst jetisoning Saeed. Saeed’s release gets one line on her Facebook; POTUS’ telephone call, ten!* I note that in addition to the POTUS, Naghmeh in a long Facebook update cites no less than three people – all males – in standing by her. The cynic in me predicts that one of those, will perhaps, continue to have a major part to play in her family life. As Poke Salad writes, the end game will be interesting.
Despite KP’s above comment (which I find highly unlikely to be true) if nevertheless, that was how the story first got legs, I would say that looks less like a breach of confidentiality and more like a deliberate leak.
*I also could not help noticing – perhaps in the excitement she became confused – and so I will refrain from the perennial and tiresome joke about Americans and Geography – that Naghmeh says on Facebook that Saeed is now in a safe country, Germany, but on Twitter, she says he is in Geneva (which is of course in Switzerland – and not even the German part of Switzerland). Presumably he is being de-briefed.
Where does Moore believe this “Evangelical Community” gets any authority?
Granted, I really haven’t been keeping up with this story, but at least one thing sounds quite strange. (Ok, more than one thing.) If his wife spoke with him frequently by Skype, why hasn’t the daughter heard his voice for years?
KP:
It doesn’t matter whether Naghmeh intended for her email claiming Saeed had been “abusive” to go public or not. She should not have been saying ANYTHING about claimed “abuse” in an email to ANYONE. If she really believed Saeed had been abusing her, that should have been said only to a counselor or therapist — NEVER EVER in an email to a prayer group. Naghmeh should have known better, since she was a public figure whether she intended to be such or not.
This is even without mentioning how incredible (as in not believable, as in “of questionable credibility”) the allegations of abuse are. Naghmeh and Saeed married in the early noughts, around 2002. Naghmeh claims Saeed had been using porn since BEFORE they married. So, we’re to believe a pastor was using porn, she knew about it, and, as a devout Christian, she…. married him anyway?
Robert What?,
I don’t know, but since he was a prisoner in Iran, they could have set terms for Skype calls.
@KP
There is no question that she sent the emails. She has confirmed that she did. What does seem to be true is that she hoped to gossip about her husband without being caught doing so. Your claim is it was a prayer group, implying this was only shared to allow others to pray for Saeed. But she could have asked for their prayers without trashing her husband. Moreover, she made it clear that she shared this information because she wanted them to know it, because she felt that she was “living a lie” by not telling them about how bad Saeed is.
Again, not true. She said in the emails that she was going to stop publicly advocating for Saeed because he was an abuser. Then she went silent for a few weeks before resurfacing and reconfirming that she was no longer going to publicly advocate for his release. She said her advocacy was going to be in prayer for Saeed instead, and encouraged her Facebook followers to pray with her that God would use Saeed’s imprisonment to free him of his wife abusing ways.
Then she followed through and stopped referencing Saeed. You claim the fasting she started on Jan 5 was for Saeed, but she explained multiple times that it was to bring herself closer to God and thereby lead her followers. On Dec 7 she wrote:
She reiterated this on Jan 4th:
“Again, not true. She said in the emails that she was going to stop publicly advocating for Saeed because he was an abuser.”
Nothing I have ever read supports this assertion. I agree that is what the information given IMPLIES, but it also implied that she sent a “series of messages out to supporters”, which implied very public admonishment that was intended to be widespread. That wasn’t true, and I don’t think the above is true either (unless either she, or the lawyer who represents her family, has said something further that I haven’t read).
The reason the lawyer gave for her backing away from the public, “for a few months”
(not permanently…which would be strange if this was about abuse) and she indirectly confirmed: Stress
In Liz’s world, women aren’t passive-aggressive.
The reason the lawyer gave for her backing away from the public, “for a few months” (not permanently…which would be strange if this was about abuse) and she indirectly confirmed: Stress
She could have avoided a great deal of stress by simply not trashing her husband to her hen club / “prayer partners” / gossip circle.
Too bad there’s no advice in the Bible for wives to follow, isn’t it, Liz?
We’re supposed to respond to women’s clear indications, like Jim Carrey in Dumb and Dumber.”
In my world many women are passive aggressive, Anchorman.
But I’ll bite here, what would be the point here? If Naghmeh wanted to excoriate her husband and subject him to public ridicule and widespread scrutiny, why be so very coy about it? She must truly be the darkest of dark triade people. First supporting him for a few years just waiting it all out so she could…attention whore and victim whore and all that.
Never mind.
@Liz
Yet she didn’t back away from public for a few months. After a few weeks of silence, she came back on Dec 7th, opening her message with:
In this message she reiterated that she was changing the form of her advocacy to praying for Saeed. Since her praying for him can’t have been truly new, the obvious meaning is praying for him but not publicly advocating for him. And this she did. After trashing him publicly in the Dec 7th facebook post, she went on to post regularly and from what I have found stopped mentioning Saeed entirely until he was released. He wasn’t even mentioned in her Christmas tweet. It was a picture of her and the kids, and there was no mention of Saeed not being there.
Everything she ostensibly didn’t want to make public that she said to the gossip group she later reiterated publicly. She got caught, and instead of repenting she doubled down. This is very ugly business, and the degree to which you find yourself identifying with it should bother you greatly.
Liz uses the words, “passive aggressive,” yet doesn’t seem to grasp the meaning.
Just “whore” will suffice.
Speaking of passive-aggressive…
Dalrock: “In this message she reiterated that she was changing the form of her advocacy to praying for Saeed. Since her praying for him can’t have been truly new, the obvious meaning is praying for him but not publicly advocating for him.”
You are reading a lot into this.
“Praying for him OBVIOUSLY means NOT publicly advocating for him”? Truly?
What she stopped was the public speaking engagements and tours. Temporarily.
“Everything she ostensibly didn’t want to make public that she said to the gossip group she later reiterated publicly. She got caught, and instead of repenting she doubled down. This is very ugly business, and the degree to which you find yourself identifying with it should bother you greatly.”
Well, no need to be quite so insulting, Dalrock. Just ask me to leave and stop disagreeing with you. Can I identify with my family and/or people very close to me being subjected to highly inaccurate and biased media portrayals?
More than you would ever know. Should this bother me? Not at all. I feel comparatively well informed. I will not darken your door again, Dalrock.
Peace and Grace
-Liz out
I think it loses something without the frantic snatching of items from the bathroom vanity, scooping hastily discarded clothes from the night before (um, that’s my sweatshirt I left you, but whatever), and the door slam, but I still appreciate good theatrics.
Well, no need to be quite so insulting, Dalrock. Just ask me to leave and stop disagreeing with you.
Her argument quickly routed by the facts, squid-inking Liz pretends to slink off the battlefield at Dalrock’s request! *chuckles*
Passive-aggressive behavior gets no better than this.
I will not darken your door again, Dalrock.
A Pinocchiism in the company of such kindred as “I am not a crook,” “I desire no more territory,” and “no new taxes.”
I’ve noted the very very limited, light treatment the abuse allegations have received since Saeed’s release and impending return to the US. The only thing I’ve seen is a recount of the abuse claims, with a statement by some pastor/Christian authority intoning that abuse allegations are “serious” and need to be “addressed” and that “abuse is a real problem even in Christian families” or some such.
I predict that the abuse allegations will disappear very soon down the memory hole, together with a few well placed statements dismissing them as “handled” and “in the past” and “don’t matter now that Saeed is home with his family where he should be” and that “justice has been done”. The claims need to disappear because we can’t have Naghmeh held up to public scrutiny. They need to disappear because Naghmeh must be free to continue her “public ministry” and “outreach”, unencumbered by the ugly business of “abuse claims”.
Come on, people. That is in the past. It doesn’t matter now. We need to move on to very important matters like ministry to the needy, Christian martyrs still imprisoned for their faith, the administration of the Gospel and sacraments, and the elevation of women into public ministries. We need to let Naghmeh and Saeed work it out. We need to “step back and respect their privacy” while Naghmeh continues on her Victory Freedom Tour 2016.
Liz, showing us how it’s done! Playing the passive aggressive damsel in distress to a T! Doesn’t get better than that.
deti,
I think they will also go down the memory hole.
Why? I’d ask him, “Did you hear about the allegations? How did your captors react?”
I don’t think the Christian press wants the public to hear the answers to those questions.
@Liz
As I have explained in detailed posts, the public speaking engagements aren’t all that changed. Saeed stopped being the topic of her posts. She switched gears, from wife advocating for her husband’s release to Christian leader teaching her Facebook flock. This is how the press read her very clear messages too. For example, Charisma News wrote of her Jan 5 fast:
Naghmeh liked that article so much she tweeted it to her followers. This is the message she wanted the word to receive. I’ve linked to the Jan 4 Facebook post they were referencing, and you can see for yourself that Saeed isn’t mentioned. Nor is he mentioned in the Dec 7 Facebook post where she announced the fast. Nor did she on the multiple daily update posts I’ve linked to. Nor did she mention him on her Christmas Instagram/Tweet. She announced that she was turning a corner, and then she followed through.
But nothing, nothing, she does or writes can get through your reality distortion field, because you just know she can’t actually be doing what she is very publicly doing. This was bad enough when you were in denial back in November, but with the evidence rolling in during the months since then you are still making the same impossible claims. She could write a Facebook post saying “Liz is wrong and Dalrock is right”, and you would say “You know how Naghmeh lies!” No matter how black and white, no matter how much detail including quotes and links to her own writing, you can’t accept that she really did what she did.
Hey Deti, that sounds like Obo and Kerry, carrying on about how “their deal with Iran” helped to get the sailors back from a now progressive Iran.
I still think this release of the bastard is the worst thing for this woman. She can no longer be the widow of a martyred hero, with all the cash and prizes that awaited her.
She now has to walk the walk, as a good Christian leader and accept the bastard back into the family and have him steal the spotlight for the next few weeks.
My prediction is that the bastards’ abuse will escalate to the point where she will have no option but to divorce him. Thus gaining momentum again in her pursuit of leading a flock and maybe one day running a mega church.
DeNihilist,
I admit it’s wandering deeper into conspiracy theory, but you post got me thinking.
Did she let the abuse allegations “slip” months ago because she received word he was closer to being released? Is this why she stopped advocating for his release? Because she knew he’d be home in the next six months?
Plant the seeds for, “This is why I divorced him” months before he could respond/defend himself.
http://www1.cbn.com/cbnnews/us/2016/January/Naghmeh-Abedini-tells-children-Daddys-Coming-Home/
Naghmeh talking to The Christian Broadcasting Network.
“In late November 2015, Naghmeh shared with supporters that she was stopping all public efforts to gain her husband’s release following revelations about some very serious personal challenges inside her family, including “abuse” issues.”
“Naghmeh said since revealing those marital challenges, she has gained a new understanding of what it means to suffer abuse.
“”My brokeness has allowed me to understand other people who have gone through similar struggles and abuse in their own relationships so we are both broken people.”
“Naghmeh said she regretted making those marital challenges public but insisted “there needs to be change” and healing going forward.
“”I love him, but there are serious issues that we need to deal with once he’s home.””
And so it begins. Perhaps I was wrong that the abuse claims will disappear down the memory hole. The Christian media reports the “abuse” allegations as fact. Despite his being nearly martyred for his faith, Saeed will face a new persecution once he arrives home. He’ll now be forced to “answer” for “abusing” Naghmeh. He’s already been tried and convicted in the Christian media before he’s even had a chance to say anything about private claims which were made public. He’ll be hauled to task for “abuse” before the Christian media. Saeed will be made an example of “abusive” Christian men, and how even devout Christian pastors aren’t immune from “fleshly” pursuits. Saeed is already being held out as an abuser BY HIS OWN WIFE. She is already busy arraying support for her side to attack and “hold him to task” when he arrives on US soil.
He should be happily reuniting with a wife who loves him and children who need their father. Instead he will face a hostile and unforgiving Christian media that has already convicted him. He’ll be forced into “recovery” and “restoration” before he’ll be allowed to resume public ministry. He’ll be forced to “acknowledge” his “abuse” publicly.
This will likely strain their marriage to the breaking point. This is looking more and more like a power play on Naghmeh’s part. I can’t imagine their marriage surviving this.
Treatpoint, deti. Threatpoint.
thedeti says:
January 19, 2016 at 2:19 pm
All I can say is that if what you predict comes to pass, my God visit justice upon Saeed’s tormentors.
Right, she thought for sure the Iranians would have killed him. Is he not an apostate to the muslim way?
Here she was going to be the widow of a modern day saint (don’t know if you protestants make saints like us Catholics), her life was going to be GOLD!
Now the Bastard is coming home and ruining it all.
But wait, she can still gain her pieces of gold if he is discredited.
Abuse!
Would I be correct in supposing that when on the 5th January Naghmeh announces that she is going on a twenty-one day fast that what she is really doing (post Xmas festivities) is going on a twenty-one day diet?
@DeNihilist:
Not gold, pieces of silver.
@Opus:
We thought as much, but she doesn’t seem to have even got that far. Maybe she cut out the snack food?
LG – I was taking inflation into account.
He should be happily reuniting with a wife who loves him and children who need their father. Instead he will face a hostile and unforgiving Christian media that has already convicted him.
Yep! He is going to need our prayers. The enemy has sowed seeds of discord in Pastor Saeed’s family and rallied the wolves in sheep’s clothing against him.
What do you make of this?: https://www.facebook.com/NaghmehAbedini/posts/10153791405295767?pnref=story
“I am believing in a miracle for our marriage. WE need your prayers more than ever. The enemy wants to bring division and destruction. Please pray that we can heal and move forward united as a family.”
I am not sure why these things take so long but according to Mrs Abedini her husband has been meeting with a Congressman, arrives in America tomorrow and will be reunited with his family next week. That is what she says on Twitter.
I am thus reminded of GBFM’s favourite The Odyssey of Homer but even when Odysseus arrived back in Ithaca he was not accused by Penelope of having abused her whilst he was fighting The Trojans. Let’s hope that Pastor Abedini despatches his wife’s suitors (various other Pastors) in a suitably direct and Odyssean manner. What I fear is that he may wish he were back in Iran. He needs to be forewarned by a Tiresias. Let’s hope he is led to this blog so he can arm himself psychologically.
Fried Chicken, answered above. She will accept him back as a good Christian wife, but eventually, the abuse will return and be far to much for even her to handle.
KaChing!
@Fried Chicken:
There’s far more money to be made and attention to gain by playing the martyr for a while. She would lose everything if she pulls the ripcord in the next 2-3 years. So her mind is working furiously to figure a way out of the problem.
@DeNihilst:
Touche. 🙂
More on Naghmeh and Saeed, and the abuse allegations:
http://townhall.com/news/politics-elections/2016/01/21/wife-of-us-pastor-imprisoned-in-iran-hopes-to-reunite-rebuild-marriage-n2108190
She says she’s “not rushing the reunion” of her marriage. The relationship between Saeed and Naghmeh “has been strained in recent months by the publication of an email she sent to friends and supporters late last year. Her note described “physical, emotional, psychological and sexual” abuse by her husband, who she said was addicted to pornography.”
***
“I have hope that we can work through all the issues and we can restore our marriage,” Naghmeh Abedini, 38, told Reuters in a wide-ranging interview. “My Christian faith does give me a lot of hope in that.”
“Naghmeh Abedini said she expects the family will enter counseling, and that she will continue working to promote religious freedom and bring attention to Christian persecution.”
“Later, she said, the couple communicated directly on a number of occasions by phone or Skype. During that time, Naghmeh said, her husband became increasingly abusive, possibly because of his long confinement. She declined to elaborate on the nature of the abusive behavior.”
Naghmeh didn’t agree with Saeed’s decision to continue Christian mission to Iran. “”It was probably not the smartest idea to go back, with all the history,” Naghmeh Abedini said, “but he did it, and as a wife, I just let him.””
“During most of her husband’s time in prison, Abedini served as the public face of the campaign for his release. But their private conversations, she said, became ever more fraught.
““I just couldn’t understand – the more I fought for him the more abusive he was becoming,” she said.”
“she sent the emails about her marriage that attracted so much attention. She said she was “very upset” when they were made public, in a Christianity Today article, and that her husband was “devastated.””
Fascinating stuff. Naghmeh reacted emotionally, and has created serious marital problems because of it. Her husband was in prison in fear for his life. He was probably reacting out of fear and despair, which she misread as “abusive”. She made it all about her (of course). She has now apparently decided to impose all manner of “conditions” on him before she will “reconcile” with her newly freed husband.
He was in prison, in fear for his life, because he followed a mission that he viewed as larger than himself, and he was ready to give his life for it. Naghmeh viewed it as stupid and selfish. She then made it all about her when he lashed out in fear, anger, despair and pain. She wasn’t there for him, she didn’t have his back, she abandoned him when he needed her most.
thedeti, I noticed that the Reuters article you linked to contains the following statements:
“Reuters could not independently confirm Abedini’s allegations about her husband.”
and:
“Half a dozen Saeed Abedini supporters reached by Reuters all said they had no direct knowledge of any abuse.”
It is sad that none of the articles in the Christian press seem to have included this type of statement.
How long before we hear that Saeed suffers from Palin (sic) Traumatic Stress Disorder?
And since he was not released until after his wife’s abuse allegations, it is entirely possible that the Iranian government made it a condition of his release to discredit his ministry in some way.
I still think her sudden change of heart can be attributed to an affair
@Dalrock
Wow. She is really crazy. I take back whatever benefit of the doubt I gave her.